INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(211, 2, '2017-06-06 01:01:29', '2017-06-05 23:01:29', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\"> Where did my libido go?</span></h2>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<h3>The routine that kills!</h3>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">We all know it, sexual routine tends to kill desire. After a few years, we get tired of having sex with the same person, the same way &amp; being able to predict the next move from your partner. We all know the mantra: \"We must add variety to our sex life if we want to continue having it\"</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What does it mean to add variety to our sex life?</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Yeah...that isn\'t very clear for a lot of people. Do we have to buy sex toys or do Christian Grey stuff (50 shades of Grey)? Buy a Kama Sutra book and stretch before sex? Do we change rooms? Do it in public or get out the whipped cream? And what if you don\'t want to do any of those things? Are we doomed to never have sex again?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nWe can certainly do some of those things to get our genitals going a bit in the bedroom. Although,  that is like turning the TV on its side and watching a movie for the 250th time...we can all understand that it is the same film on the screen. <b>We know the ending, the surprises, the jokes and the explosions before they even happen. Nothing surprises us or gives us real joy for what is coming next.</b>\r\n\r\nChanging rooms or adding sexual positions to your repertoire or integrating sex toys to your sex life will not make it more passionate and enjoyable. It can bring a bit of variety, but it will not last long over time if it is the only thing you do to add variety.\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">So, what are we suppose to do?</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>Too many times in my office, I see couples who throw themselves at changing things rapidly in their sexual behaviour, that has little to no significance in depth. They want quick and effective solutions without the effort on their part. <b>But, isn\'t that where you would want to put some effort? Isn\'t it important to give importance and time to your partner if you don\'t want to take them for granted? Would you not want them to take care of you, your relationship and your sexuality together?</b></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">But, sex and desire are supposed to be natural!</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>Well, not really actually! There is nothing natural about sex. We are not born \"<a href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkFfK-mh1kQ\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Sex Bombs</a>\" (as Tom Jones used to say), we become one. <b>Think about your first sexual relationship. Were you confident, charming, competent, natural and seductive the first time? Did you know how to kiss properly in your teen years? Probably not!</b> Our first times are awkward, embarrassing, full of uncertainties and insecurities. Over time, we become better at it and gain confidence. Eventually, we hit the wall of sexual incompetence...again. <b>Tadaah</b>! This is where the next phase of your sex life begins.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div><span style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n</span>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<span style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n</span>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/07/perte-2Blibido.jpg\"><img title=\"sexual desire sexologist\" src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/07/perte-2Blibido.jpg\" alt=\"couple therapy, therapist, sexologist, sextherapist\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"font-size: 12.8px;\">Find the joy of sex again</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Changing the paradigm of sexuality</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">You certainly know what sexual performance is right? This is what makes sex satisfying and energizing. Being with a partner who knows what they are doing and has the proper techniques is a sure shot for success in bed. <b>This formula works for the first few months or years to increase sexual arousal at its highest and it is the quickest way possible to orgasm. </b>Although, it is exactly this way of having sex that kills sexual desire</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">When we aim for sexual performance, we do what we know works to reach orgasm. Touch here, touch there and BOOM, you get an orgasm. Other times, you retouch here, you retouch there...and peeewwww...Nothing really happens. This happens over months and years where there are ups and downs, but sexual satisfaction is on a constant drop.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">This is where sexual routine starts in long term relationships. When the objective is to sexually arouse yourself and your partner, we use formulaic approaches in a repetitive manner with small variations that slowly but surely work less over time. <b>This creates anxiety and insecurities because we feel incompetent, undesirable and nervous when we have sex. Nothing to get your sex drive high.</b></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Erections are harder to obtain or are half soft, lubrification is less abundant, orgasms are rarer or none existent. Desire and passion are being drained out of the relationship because sexual satisfaction isn\'t part of sex anymore. Spontaneity and surprises are far and few and seduction is very rare. We sometimes desperately try again with the same formula hoping to get different results.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">Sexual connexion &amp; presence</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">What really brings change and variation to sex is your capacity to change the tone and dynamic of the relationship during your lovemaking. I<b>f we introduce sex toys but we keep the same attitude, with the same anxieties and our sexual performance mantra; we are making love the same way, except that we have a piece of plastic in our hands.</b> If you change the eye contact you have, your touch, your intention and the manner in which you flirt with the other person you are bringing sex to another level. You are changing the relationship you have with your partner!</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you look your partner in the eyes during sex? (1 minute or more)</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">How do you feel connected to your partner during sex?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">What do you think about while having sex? What is your internal dialogue during sex, from start to finish?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">When does sex start for you? (Flirting, kissing, being naked, penetration, oral sex)</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">When does it end?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">How do you flirt and create sexual desire in yourself and your partner?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">What type of variations do you bring while flirting? While having sex?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">How would you describe your sexual style? (intense, horny, soft, tender, affectionate, funny, playful, genitally oriented, passionate, emotional, loving, flamboyant, etc.)</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">How would you describe your partner\'s style?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\"> What makes sex satisfying according to you? ( orgasm, presence with the other person, length, rigidity of the penis, intensity of the connexion, letting go, emotional fusion with the other, etc.)</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">What makes sex satisfying according to your partner?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">What makes you sexually attractive as a sexual partner? (Why would people want to have sex with you?)</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">What do you like in your partner sexually?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">What do they like about you sexually?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">What do you like the least?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you ever talk about it? Why or why not?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">What do they least prefer about you during sex?</li>\r\n 	<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">Have you ever talked about it? Why or why not?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<h3>Killing the routine!</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sexuality isn\'t just a question of backflips and introducing the funkiest of behaviours, although it can be very interesting at times. <b>It is a sexual RELATIONSHIP with the other person.</b> This connexion can be affectionate and/or sexual. When we take the time to feel and take pleasure to all our sensations of our bodies, our connexion and presence to the other person rather than trying to perform...variety becomes easier to integrate into sex.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: medium; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px;\"></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois-278x300.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->', 'Getting stuck in a sexual routine', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '25-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:01:29', '2017-06-05 23:01:29', '', 25, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/25-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(212, 2, '2017-06-06 01:05:54', '2017-06-05 23:05:54', '&nbsp;\n<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">What brings out the worst in people</span></h2>\n<div><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\"> </span></div>\n<h3><span style=\"font-size: large;\">What can having an affair mean about a relationship</span></h3>\n<div><span style=\"font-size: small;\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: large;\">In my last article, we talked about <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2016/02/infidelity-is-it-really-the-worst-thing-that-can-happen-to-a-couple.html\">learning from an infidelity</a>, which looked at understanding what had brought on the affair in the first place and how it was related to the relationship. When you take the time to question yourself on how you contributed to the relationship issues, whether you cheated on your spouse or you were cheated on, you can start repairing what had already been broken.</span></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: small;\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">It was briefly mentioned how partners can neglect and betray each other in a relationship in other ways than being unfaithful. <b>In a relationship, we have unwritten rules and expectations from each other that we rarely if ever talk about.</b> When they are not clear, it can lead to many dissatisfactions surrounding the relationship and then partners tend to take it out on their spouse\'s when they feel that they\'ve been wronged concerning their expectations.</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Take the time to reflect on what exactly were yours at the beginning of the relationship and what are they now. Have they changed? Does your partner know about them? Do you know and understand theirs? Did you just assume they had the same as yours? Do you feel you have been taking care of them? If not, why did you neglect them? Does your partner take care of yours?</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Entitlement</h3>\n<div></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">As humans, people tend to feel entitled to certain things in a relationship even though they don\'t even do their own part. When we feel that our partner must answer certain demands of ours without even considering if they want to or can, this creates a lot of frustration. <b>When we feel that our partner has neglected some of our expectations, we can sometimes be compelled to get revenge and just be mean to each other. </b>Sometimes, we will neglect their expectations and demands because we want to punish them. Eventually, you end up with 2 people constantly punishing each other for the lack of effort each of them puts into the relationship.</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n&nbsp;\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Wanting sex and not getting any</h4>\n<div></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Let\'s give an example of how entitlement and our expectations lead to hurt feelings and bruised egos. Sally wants more sex than Kim who has always been the partner with lower sexual desire. Sally feels that sex is something that couples are supposed to do in order to be happy. Kim wants quality time and to have shared responsibility concerning the kids and the housework. When one of them doesn\'t get what they want, they don\'t give back what the other one expects. <b>Eventually, each partner builds up frustrations, feelings of entitlement, resentment and the seed of revenge is slowly and painfully making its way into the core of the relationship dynamic. </b>Both partners feel hurt that the other one isn\'t taking care of them, but neither is willing to give out first because their egos would have to take a hit.</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Revenge is sweet but ultimately bitter</h4>\n<div></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Even though revenge for most people is seen as a bad thing, it doesn\'t take away the instant satisfaction you get out of doing it. <b>Most people will deny that they have this tendency but rarely do people not have the knee-jerk reaction to use it when they feel they\'ve been taken advantage of. </b>Admitting that we do this in our relationship with our spouse is what most people would consider relationship suicide and the cause of an instant separation. If you ever do admit to it, do yourself and your relationship a favour: <u><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/04/unhealthy-couple-dynamics.html\">Do NOT pretend this is an unconscious thing!</a></u></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The thing that is hard about stopping revenge is that we actually truly enjoy it. We feel entitled to it even! When you get two spouses playing the revenge and entitlement game, you end up with a lot of hurt feelings and a very unhappy relationship. This relationship dynamic isn\'t always so obvious, as it can be very subtle and ultimately very hard to even perceive.</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-yswW_-fBuyQ/Vr1YOm9tTtI/AAAAAAAAAzA/R_lAWNc9vdA/s1600/bad-relationships.jpg\"><img src=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-yswW_-fBuyQ/Vr1YOm9tTtI/AAAAAAAAAzA/R_lAWNc9vdA/s320/bad-relationships.jpg\" width=\"320\" height=\"280\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\n</div>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Being vengeful by having an affair</h3>\n<div></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The subtleness of entitlement and revengefulness in couples is what can lead sometimes to be unfaithful. One partner might just use this reasoning to go seek elsewhere what they wanted from their relationship all along and that they feel has been neglected. All the while knowing, that it was done out of spite to their partner. You might be thinking that this is a monstrous way to look at relationships and people. I would absolutely agree, but it is also the way you can bring the best out of people. As David Schnarch, so clearly says: \"the best in us brings out the worst in us because the worst in us denies its own existence\".</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Confronting our own inner demons</h4>\n<div></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">When partners in a relationship individually decide to face the horrors they have been putting themselves and their spouse through is when the real change can begin. <b>When we deny what we purposely do to our spouse out of revenge and entitlement, we create an even worst dynamic where we perpetuate the myth that we are just not capable of being a better person. </b></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">ARE YOU WILLING TO FACE YOURSELF IN FRONT OF YOU PARTNER?</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\nLearn more about the author\n\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div>\n<div>\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\n<div>* indicates required</div>\n<div><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address * </label></div>\n<div><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label></div>\n<div><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label></div>\n<div></div>\n<div></div>\n<div></div>\n</div>\n</div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div></div>\n<div></div>\n<div></div>', 'Revenge: The Ugly Side of Infidelity', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '26-autosave-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:05:54', '2017-06-05 23:05:54', '', 26, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/26-autosave-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(391, 2, '2017-09-30 00:08:26', '2017-09-29 22:08:26', '&nbsp;\r\n<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">What brings out the worst in people</span></h2>\r\n<div><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\"> </span></div>\r\n<h3><span style=\"font-size: large;\">What can having an affair mean about a relationship</span></h3>\r\n<div><span style=\"font-size: small;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: large;\">In my last article, we talked about <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2016/02/infidelity-is-it-really-the-worst-thing-that-can-happen-to-a-couple.html\">learning from an infidelity</a>, which looked at understanding what had brought on the affair in the first place and how it was related to the relationship. When you take the time to question yourself on how you contributed to the relationship issues, whether you cheated on your spouse or you were cheated on, you can start repairing what had already been broken.</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: small;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">It was briefly mentioned how partners can neglect and betray each other in a relationship in other ways than being unfaithful. <b>In a relationship, we have unwritten rules and expectations from each other that we rarely if ever talk about.</b> When they are not clear, it can lead to many dissatisfactions surrounding the relationship and then partners tend to take it out on their spouse\'s when they feel that they\'ve been wronged concerning their expectations.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Take the time to reflect on what exactly were yours at the beginning of the relationship and what are they now. Have they changed? Does your partner know about them? Do you know and understand theirs? Did you just assume they had the same as yours? Do you feel you have been taking care of them? If not, why did you neglect them? Does your partner take care of yours?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Entitlement</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">As humans, people tend to feel entitled to certain things in a relationship even though they don\'t even do their own part. When we feel that our partner must answer certain demands of ours without even considering if they want to or can, this creates a lot of frustration. <b>When we feel that our partner has neglected some of our expectations, we can sometimes be compelled to get revenge and just be mean to each other. </b>Sometimes, we will neglect their expectations and demands because we want to punish them. Eventually, you end up with 2 people constantly punishing each other for the lack of effort each of them puts into the relationship.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Wanting sex and not getting any</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Let\'s give an example of how entitlement and our expectations lead to hurt feelings and bruised egos. Sally wants more sex than Kim who has always been the partner with lower sexual desire. Sally feels that sex is something that couples are supposed to do in order to be happy. Kim wants quality time and to have shared responsibility concerning the kids and the housework. When one of them doesn\'t get what they want, they don\'t give back what the other one expects. <b>Eventually, each partner builds up frustrations, feelings of entitlement, resentment and the seed of revenge is slowly and painfully making its way into the core of the relationship dynamic. </b>Both partners feel hurt that the other one isn\'t taking care of them, but neither is willing to give out first because their egos would have to take a hit.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Revenge is sweet but ultimately bitter</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Even though revenge for most people is seen as a bad thing, it doesn\'t take away the instant satisfaction you get out of doing it. <b>Most people will deny that they have this tendency but rarely do people not have the knee-jerk reaction to use it when they feel they\'ve been taken advantage of. </b>Admitting that we do this in our relationship with our spouse is what most people would consider relationship suicide and the cause of an instant separation. If you ever do admit to it, do yourself and your relationship a favour: <u><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/04/unhealthy-couple-dynamics.html\">Do NOT pretend this is an unconscious thing!</a></u></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The thing that is hard about stopping revenge is that we actually truly enjoy it. We feel entitled to it even! When you get two spouses playing the revenge and entitlement game, you end up with a lot of hurt feelings and a very unhappy relationship. This relationship dynamic isn\'t always so obvious, as it can be very subtle and ultimately very hard to even perceive.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"></div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Being vengeful by having an affair</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The subtleness of entitlement and revengefulness in couples is what can lead sometimes to be unfaithful. One partner might just use this reasoning to go seek elsewhere what they wanted from their relationship all along and that they feel has been neglected. All the while knowing, that it was done out of spite to their partner. You might be thinking that this is a monstrous way to look at relationships and people. I would absolutely agree, but it is also the way you can bring the best out of people. As David Schnarch, so clearly says: \"the best in us brings out the worst in us because the worst in us denies its own existence\".</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Confronting our own inner demons</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">When partners in a relationship individually decide to face the horrors they have been putting themselves and their spouse through is when the real change can begin. <b>When we deny what we purposely do to our spouse out of revenge and entitlement, we create an even worst dynamic where we perpetuate the myth that we are just not capable of being a better person. </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">ARE YOU WILLING TO FACE YOURSELF IN FRONT OF YOU PARTNER?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->', 'Revenge: The Ugly Side of Infidelity', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '26-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-09-30 00:08:26', '2017-09-29 22:08:26', '', 26, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/09/26-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(213, 2, '2017-06-06 01:06:45', '2017-06-05 23:06:45', '&nbsp;\r\n<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">What brings out the worst in people</span></h2>\r\n<div><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\"> </span></div>\r\n<h3><span style=\"font-size: large;\">What can having an affair mean about a relationship</span></h3>\r\n<div><span style=\"font-size: small;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: large;\">In my last article, we talked about <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2016/02/infidelity-is-it-really-the-worst-thing-that-can-happen-to-a-couple.html\">learning from an infidelity</a>, which looked at understanding what had brought on the affair in the first place and how it was related to the relationship. When you take the time to question yourself on how you contributed to the relationship issues, whether you cheated on your spouse or you were cheated on, you can start repairing what had already been broken.</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: small;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">It was briefly mentioned how partners can neglect and betray each other in a relationship in other ways than being unfaithful. <b>In a relationship, we have unwritten rules and expectations from each other that we rarely if ever talk about.</b> When they are not clear, it can lead to many dissatisfactions surrounding the relationship and then partners tend to take it out on their spouse\'s when they feel that they\'ve been wronged concerning their expectations.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Take the time to reflect on what exactly were yours at the beginning of the relationship and what are they now. Have they changed? Does your partner know about them? Do you know and understand theirs? Did you just assume they had the same as yours? Do you feel you have been taking care of them? If not, why did you neglect them? Does your partner take care of yours?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Entitlement</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">As humans, people tend to feel entitled to certain things in a relationship even though they don\'t even do their own part. When we feel that our partner must answer certain demands of ours without even considering if they want to or can, this creates a lot of frustration. <b>When we feel that our partner has neglected some of our expectations, we can sometimes be compelled to get revenge and just be mean to each other. </b>Sometimes, we will neglect their expectations and demands because we want to punish them. Eventually, you end up with 2 people constantly punishing each other for the lack of effort each of them puts into the relationship.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Wanting sex and not getting any</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Let\'s give an example of how entitlement and our expectations lead to hurt feelings and bruised egos. Sally wants more sex than Kim who has always been the partner with lower sexual desire. Sally feels that sex is something that couples are supposed to do in order to be happy. Kim wants quality time and to have shared responsibility concerning the kids and the housework. When one of them doesn\'t get what they want, they don\'t give back what the other one expects. <b>Eventually, each partner builds up frustrations, feelings of entitlement, resentment and the seed of revenge is slowly and painfully making its way into the core of the relationship dynamic. </b>Both partners feel hurt that the other one isn\'t taking care of them, but neither is willing to give out first because their egos would have to take a hit.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Revenge is sweet but ultimately bitter</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Even though revenge for most people is seen as a bad thing, it doesn\'t take away the instant satisfaction you get out of doing it. <b>Most people will deny that they have this tendency but rarely do people not have the knee-jerk reaction to use it when they feel they\'ve been taken advantage of. </b>Admitting that we do this in our relationship with our spouse is what most people would consider relationship suicide and the cause of an instant separation. If you ever do admit to it, do yourself and your relationship a favour: <u><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/04/unhealthy-couple-dynamics.html\">Do NOT pretend this is an unconscious thing!</a></u></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The thing that is hard about stopping revenge is that we actually truly enjoy it. We feel entitled to it even! When you get two spouses playing the revenge and entitlement game, you end up with a lot of hurt feelings and a very unhappy relationship. This relationship dynamic isn\'t always so obvious, as it can be very subtle and ultimately very hard to even perceive.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-yswW_-fBuyQ/Vr1YOm9tTtI/AAAAAAAAAzA/R_lAWNc9vdA/s1600/bad-relationships.jpg\"><img src=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-yswW_-fBuyQ/Vr1YOm9tTtI/AAAAAAAAAzA/R_lAWNc9vdA/s320/bad-relationships.jpg\" width=\"320\" height=\"280\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Being vengeful by having an affair</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The subtleness of entitlement and revengefulness in couples is what can lead sometimes to be unfaithful. One partner might just use this reasoning to go seek elsewhere what they wanted from their relationship all along and that they feel has been neglected. All the while knowing, that it was done out of spite to their partner. You might be thinking that this is a monstrous way to look at relationships and people. I would absolutely agree, but it is also the way you can bring the best out of people. As David Schnarch, so clearly says: \"the best in us brings out the worst in us because the worst in us denies its own existence\".</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Confronting our own inner demons</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">When partners in a relationship individually decide to face the horrors they have been putting themselves and their spouse through is when the real change can begin. <b>When we deny what we purposely do to our spouse out of revenge and entitlement, we create an even worst dynamic where we perpetuate the myth that we are just not capable of being a better person. </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">ARE YOU WILLING TO FACE YOURSELF IN FRONT OF YOU PARTNER?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />\r\n	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />\r\n	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br />\r\n</style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->', 'Revenge: The Ugly Side of Infidelity', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '26-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:06:45', '2017-06-05 23:06:45', '', 26, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/26-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0);
INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(214, 2, '2017-06-06 01:11:59', '2017-06-05 23:11:59', '<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">How to grow from an infidelity</span></h2>\n<div></div>\n<h3>The deep trauma of infidelity</h3>\n<div></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">No one wants to experience infidelity from their partner. The hurt feelings, the betrayal, the hate, the resentment, the unanswered questions, the feeling of being undesirable in their eyes, the competitiveness from the other partner. Nothing from infidelity seems to be positive and the first thing we want to do is throw them to the curb. Which is what most of your friends and family will tell you to do. <b>For some reason, you aren\'t sure if you want to leave and you might even feel guilty about it. </b>What would explain such ambivalence towards someone who profoundly hurt your feelings and broke your trust. What if this infidelity was the best thing that could happen to your sex life and relationship?</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Learning from the infidelity</h4>\n<div></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Now don\'t get me wrong! I am not and never will be pro-infidelity. It can be compared to a traumatic experience to learn that your partner <b>betrayed you and chose egotistically</b> to satisfy their needs with another person. Infidelity is unfortunately not that uncommon and men as well as women do it for various reasons. Those reasons is what you can learn from this terrible experience. How they answer the questions and how your partner expresses their process of becoming unfaithful is a dialogue that can <b>bring you to have a deeper understanding of your relationship and possibly what was wrong with it. </b></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">It is possible that the answers you receive are going to be hard to hear or sometimes even untrue. Other times, they will never satisfy your curiosity about what went on, or how or when or how many times. But, they might also <b>make you realize that there was something lacking in the relationship</b> <b>or your sex life</b>. That you might have betrayed them in other ways and never gave it a second thought.</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\n<b>Let\'s not start pointing the blame towards the person that was cheated on with this discussion</b>. The importance is to take the time to listen on both sides about how this came to be in the relationship and maybe, how you could even repair it.\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s1600/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\"><img title=\"infidelity\" src=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s320/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\" alt=\"sexual desire, infidelity\" width=\"320\" height=\"180\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\n</tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Infidelity is a very complex process that couples need to explore deeply before taking a decision</td>\n</tr>\n</tbody>\n</table>\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What questions should you ask?</h4>\n<div></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The time of day, the number of calls, the where and the who are not questions that will alleviate the hurt feelings. <b>Actually, they might just make it worst as they don\'t really bring the answers to the questions you are probably not willing to hear.</b> A true dialogue on our partner\'s infidelity is one of the conversations that can be<b> extremely confrontational and requires that we truly listen</b>, even though, we might be the one that needs comfort and listening at that time. The questions that might bring light unto the situation are the following:</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<ul>\n 	<li>What did you get from having sex with the other person?</li>\n 	<li>Was there anything lacking from our relationship and/or sex life?</li>\n 	<li>Did you try to talk to me about it?</li>\n 	<li>Did I listen if you did?</li>\n 	<li>How come we never talked about this before?</li>\n 	<li>What brought you to do it?</li>\n 	<li>Were you thinking of me before, during or after?</li>\n 	<li>What are you remorseful for, if you feel it at all?</li>\n 	<li>How can we mend this situation from now on?</li>\n</ul>\n<div>\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<h4>What to do with the answers</h4>\n<div></div>\n<div>The discussion with the questions above are most likely things you didn\'t want to hear about yourself or your partner. <b>You might realize how awful of a person your partner is or just how badly you\'ve ignored or hurt them as well</b>. Maybe, a little bit of both. You may want to decide that after the <u>numerous conversation on the issue</u>, that the best thing is to leave the relationship because that is how you will keep your integrity and self-respect. You might also consider that you had a part to play in this, even though you weren\'t the one who made the decision to be unfaithful.  You might have ignored the signs or your responsibilities towards maintaining a fulfilling relationship and sex life.</div>\n<div>\n<h3>Bringing back the trust</h3>\n</div>\n<div></div>\n<h4>Jealousy and possessiveness</h4>\n<div></div>\n<div>It is not uncommon that jealousy and possessiveness will rise up after being so badly wounded in our egos. We seek after being hurt, to feel secure and capable of having some form of control over the situation. It is important that <b>this jealousy and possessiveness don\'t overwhelm your new dynamic </b>after an infidelity. The partner who cheated can help by ensuring the boundaries of the relationship for a while and reassure the other on their actions. It is important though, ensuring does not become the new norm, nor that it binds you and your partner in a prison of insecurity.</div>\n<div></div>\n<div>Jealousy and possessiveness are <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/08/jealousy-destroyer-of-couples.html\">common reasons why there is infidelity</a>. Feeling trapped in a relationship you can\'t get out of is sometimes what brings one partner to jump the fence. The partner who has been cheated on must find ways <b>to self-soothe their insecurity and build on a solid-flexible self that makes them a desirable partner to be with</b>. By changing the dynamic in ourselves from being validated by our partner to being self-validating and feeling self-desirable makes for a strong foundation in a couple.</div>\n<div></div>\n<h4>Recognizing the hurt and remorse</h4>\n<div></div>\n<div>The partner who cheated is often times not remorseful of having been unfaithful, but of hurting their partner. When they were having the affair, they felt alive, desirable and awake. Rarely does someone regret that. <b>Showing true remorse for what we did, demonstrates that we still care about our partner even though we hurt them deeply</b>. The one who had the affair needs to now deal with being the one who has created such pain. You can\'t hurt someone by your actions that you knew would hurt if they found out and then asking them not to talk about it. <b>The person who cheated must face the consequences of his actions and have a mirror of the devastation they created.</b></div>\n<div></div>\n<div>It is important to note that the one of was cheated on must have the space to talk and process their pain and not just use that time to attack and play the victim towards the other. Coming to terms with such betrayal of what we once assumed was a safe and secure environment takes times. <b>Time that must be used appropriately by expressing and processing the mourning of what will never be the same again. </b></div>\n<div>\n\n<hr />\n\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\nLearn more about the author\n\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\n\n<style type=\"text/css\">\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\n</label>\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\n</div>\n</form></div>\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div></div>\n<div>\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div></div>\n<h3>Learn more on infidelity</h3>\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2016/02/revenge-the-ugly-side-of-infidelity.html\">Revenge: The Ugly Side of Infidelity</a>\n\n</div>\n</div>', 'Infidelity: Is it really the worst thing that can happen to a couple?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '27-autosave-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:11:59', '2017-06-05 23:11:59', '', 27, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/27-autosave-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(215, 2, '2017-06-06 01:09:16', '2017-06-05 23:09:16', '<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">How to grow from an infidelity</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>The deep trauma of infidelity</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">No one wants to experience infidelity from their partner. The hurt feelings, the betrayal, the hate, the resentment, the unanswered questions, the feeling of being undesirable in their eyes, the competitiveness from the other partner. Nothing from infidelity seems to be positive and the first thing we want to do is throw them to the curb. Which is what most of your friends and family will tell you to do. <b>For some reason, you aren\'t sure if you want to leave and you might even feel guilty about it. </b>What would explain such ambivalence towards someone who profoundly hurt your feelings and broke your trust. What if this infidelity was the best thing that could happen to your sex life and relationship?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Learning from the infidelity</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Now don\'t get me wrong! I am not and never will be pro-infidelity. It can be compared to a traumatic experience to learn that your partner <b>betrayed you and chose egotistically</b> to satisfy their needs with another person. Infidelity is unfortunately not that uncommon and men as well as women do it for various reasons. Those reasons is what you can learn from this terrible experience. How they answer the questions and how your partner expresses their process of becoming unfaithful is a dialogue that can <b>bring you to have a deeper understanding of your relationship and possibly what was wrong with it. </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">It is possible that the answers you receive are going to be hard to hear or sometimes even untrue. Other times, they will never satisfy your curiosity about what went on, or how or when or how many times. But, they might also <b>make you realize that there was something lacking in the relationship</b> <b>or your sex life</b>. That you might have betrayed them in other ways and never gave it a second thought.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b>Let\'s not start pointing the blame towards the person that was cheated on with this discussion</b>. The importance is to take the time to listen on both sides about how this came to be in the relationship and maybe, how you could even repair it.\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s1600/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\"><img title=\"infidelity\" src=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s320/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\" alt=\"sexual desire, infidelity\" width=\"320\" height=\"180\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Infidelity is a very complex process that couples need to explore deeply before taking a decision</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What questions should you ask?</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The time of day, the number of calls, the where and the who are not questions that will alleviate the hurt feelings. <b>Actually, they might just make it worst as they don\'t really bring the answers to the questions you are probably not willing to hear.</b> A true dialogue on our partner\'s infidelity is one of the conversations that can be<b> extremely confrontational and requires that we truly listen</b>, even though, we might be the one that needs comfort and listening at that time. The questions that might bring light unto the situation are the following:</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What did you get from having sex with the other person?</li>\r\n 	<li>Was there anything lacking from our relationship and/or sex life?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did you try to talk to me about it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did I listen if you did?</li>\r\n 	<li>How come we never talked about this before?</li>\r\n 	<li>What brought you to do it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Were you thinking of me before, during or after?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are you remorseful for, if you feel it at all?</li>\r\n 	<li>How can we mend this situation from now on?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h4>What to do with the answers</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The discussion with the questions above are most likely things you didn\'t want to hear about yourself or your partner. <b>You might realize how awful of a person your partner is or just how badly you\'ve ignored or hurt them as well</b>. Maybe, a little bit of both. You may want to decide that after the <u>numerous conversation on the issue</u>, that the best thing is to leave the relationship because that is how you will keep your integrity and self-respect. You might also consider that you had a part to play in this, even though you weren\'t the one who made the decision to be unfaithful.  You might have ignored the signs or your responsibilities towards maintaining a fulfilling relationship and sex life.</div>\r\n<div>\r\n<h3>Bringing back the trust</h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Jealousy and possessiveness</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is not uncommon that jealousy and possessiveness will rise up after being so badly wounded in our egos. We seek after being hurt, to feel secure and capable of having some form of control over the situation. It is important that <b>this jealousy and possessiveness don\'t overwhelm your new dynamic </b>after an infidelity. The partner who cheated can help by insuring the boundaries of the relationship for a while and reassure the other on their actions. It is important though, ensurings does not become the new norm, nor that it binds you and your partner in a prison of insecurity.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>Jealousy and possessiveness are <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2015/08/jealousy-destroyer-of-couples.html\">common reasons why there is infidelity</a>. Feeling trapped in a relationship you can\'t get out of is sometimes what brings one partner to jump the fence. The partner who has been cheated on must find ways <b>to self-soothe their insecurity and build on a solid-flexible self that makes them a desirable partner to be with</b>. By changing the dynamic in ourselves from being validated by our partner to being self-validating and feeling self-desirable makes for a strong foundation in a couple.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Recognizing the hurt and remorse</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The partner who cheated is often times not remorseful of having been unfaithful, but of hurting their partner. When they were having the affair, they felt alive, desirable and awake. Rarely does someone regret that. <b>Showing true remorse for what we did, demonstrates that we still care about our partner even though we hurt them deeply</b>. The one who had the affair needs to now deal with being the one who has created such pain. You can\'t hurt someone by your actions that you knew would hurt if they found out and then asking them not to talk about it. <b>The person who cheated must face the consequences of his actions and have a mirror of the devastation they created.</b></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is important to note that the one of was cheated on must have the space to talk and process their pain and not just use that time to attack and play the victim towards the other. Coming to terms with such betrayal of what we once assumed was a safe and secure environment takes times. <b>Time that must be used appropriately by expressing and processing the mourning of what will never be the same again. </b></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />\r\n	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />\r\n	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br />\r\n</style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>Learn more on infidelity</h3>\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2016/02/revenge-the-ugly-side-of-infidelity.html\">Revenge: The Ugly Side of Infidelity</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>', 'Infidelity: Is it really the worst thing that can happen to a couple?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '27-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:09:16', '2017-06-05 23:09:16', '', 27, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/27-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(216, 2, '2017-06-06 01:09:41', '2017-06-05 23:09:41', '<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">How to grow from an infidelity</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>The deep trauma of infidelity</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">No one wants to experience infidelity from their partner. The hurt feelings, the betrayal, the hate, the resentment, the unanswered questions, the feeling of being undesirable in their eyes, the competitiveness from the other partner. Nothing from infidelity seems to be positive and the first thing we want to do is throw them to the curb. Which is what most of your friends and family will tell you to do. <b>For some reason, you aren\'t sure if you want to leave and you might even feel guilty about it. </b>What would explain such ambivalence towards someone who profoundly hurt your feelings and broke your trust. What if this infidelity was the best thing that could happen to your sex life and relationship?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Learning from the infidelity</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Now don\'t get me wrong! I am not and never will be pro-infidelity. It can be compared to a traumatic experience to learn that your partner <b>betrayed you and chose egotistically</b> to satisfy their needs with another person. Infidelity is unfortunately not that uncommon and men as well as women do it for various reasons. Those reasons is what you can learn from this terrible experience. How they answer the questions and how your partner expresses their process of becoming unfaithful is a dialogue that can <b>bring you to have a deeper understanding of your relationship and possibly what was wrong with it. </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">It is possible that the answers you receive are going to be hard to hear or sometimes even untrue. Other times, they will never satisfy your curiosity about what went on, or how or when or how many times. But, they might also <b>make you realize that there was something lacking in the relationship</b> <b>or your sex life</b>. That you might have betrayed them in other ways and never gave it a second thought.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b>Let\'s not start pointing the blame towards the person that was cheated on with this discussion</b>. The importance is to take the time to listen on both sides about how this came to be in the relationship and maybe, how you could even repair it.\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s1600/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\"><img title=\"infidelity\" src=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s320/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\" alt=\"sexual desire, infidelity\" width=\"320\" height=\"180\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Infidelity is a very complex process that couples need to explore deeply before taking a decision</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What questions should you ask?</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The time of day, the number of calls, the where and the who are not questions that will alleviate the hurt feelings. <b>Actually, they might just make it worst as they don\'t really bring the answers to the questions you are probably not willing to hear.</b> A true dialogue on our partner\'s infidelity is one of the conversations that can be<b> extremely confrontational and requires that we truly listen</b>, even though, we might be the one that needs comfort and listening at that time. The questions that might bring light unto the situation are the following:</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What did you get from having sex with the other person?</li>\r\n 	<li>Was there anything lacking from our relationship and/or sex life?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did you try to talk to me about it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did I listen if you did?</li>\r\n 	<li>How come we never talked about this before?</li>\r\n 	<li>What brought you to do it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Were you thinking of me before, during or after?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are you remorseful for, if you feel it at all?</li>\r\n 	<li>How can we mend this situation from now on?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h4>What to do with the answers</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The discussion with the questions above are most likely things you didn\'t want to hear about yourself or your partner. <b>You might realize how awful of a person your partner is or just how badly you\'ve ignored or hurt them as well</b>. Maybe, a little bit of both. You may want to decide that after the <u>numerous conversation on the issue</u>, that the best thing is to leave the relationship because that is how you will keep your integrity and self-respect. You might also consider that you had a part to play in this, even though you weren\'t the one who made the decision to be unfaithful.  You might have ignored the signs or your responsibilities towards maintaining a fulfilling relationship and sex life.</div>\r\n<div>\r\n<h3>Bringing back the trust</h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Jealousy and possessiveness</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is not uncommon that jealousy and possessiveness will rise up after being so badly wounded in our egos. We seek after being hurt, to feel secure and capable of having some form of control over the situation. It is important that <b>this jealousy and possessiveness don\'t overwhelm your new dynamic </b>after an infidelity. The partner who cheated can help by insuring the boundaries of the relationship for a while and reassure the other on their actions. It is important though, ensurings does not become the new norm, nor that it binds you and your partner in a prison of insecurity.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>Jealousy and possessiveness are <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2015/08/jealousy-destroyer-of-couples.html\">common reasons why there is infidelity</a>. Feeling trapped in a relationship you can\'t get out of is sometimes what brings one partner to jump the fence. The partner who has been cheated on must find ways <b>to self-soothe their insecurity and build on a solid-flexible self that makes them a desirable partner to be with</b>. By changing the dynamic in ourselves from being validated by our partner to being self-validating and feeling self-desirable makes for a strong foundation in a couple.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Recognizing the hurt and remorse</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The partner who cheated is often times not remorseful of having been unfaithful, but of hurting their partner. When they were having the affair, they felt alive, desirable and awake. Rarely does someone regret that. <b>Showing true remorse for what we did, demonstrates that we still care about our partner even though we hurt them deeply</b>. The one who had the affair needs to now deal with being the one who has created such pain. You can\'t hurt someone by your actions that you knew would hurt if they found out and then asking them not to talk about it. <b>The person who cheated must face the consequences of his actions and have a mirror of the devastation they created.</b></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is important to note that the one of was cheated on must have the space to talk and process their pain and not just use that time to attack and play the victim towards the other. Coming to terms with such betrayal of what we once assumed was a safe and secure environment takes times. <b>Time that must be used appropriately by expressing and processing the mourning of what will never be the same again. </b></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>Learn more on infidelity</h3>\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2016/02/revenge-the-ugly-side-of-infidelity.html\">Revenge: The Ugly Side of Infidelity</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>', 'Infidelity: Is it really the worst thing that can happen to a couple?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '27-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:09:41', '2017-06-05 23:09:41', '', 27, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/27-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(217, 2, '2017-06-06 01:12:06', '2017-06-05 23:12:06', '<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">How to grow from an infidelity</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>The deep trauma of infidelity</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">No one wants to experience infidelity from their partner. The hurt feelings, the betrayal, the hate, the resentment, the unanswered questions, the feeling of being undesirable in their eyes, the competitiveness from the other partner. Nothing from infidelity seems to be positive and the first thing we want to do is throw them to the curb. Which is what most of your friends and family will tell you to do. <b>For some reason, you aren\'t sure if you want to leave and you might even feel guilty about it. </b>What would explain such ambivalence towards someone who profoundly hurt your feelings and broke your trust. What if this infidelity was the best thing that could happen to your sex life and relationship?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Learning from the infidelity</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Now don\'t get me wrong! I am not and never will be pro-infidelity. It can be compared to a traumatic experience to learn that your partner <b>betrayed you and chose egotistically</b> to satisfy their needs with another person. Infidelity is unfortunately not that uncommon and men as well as women do it for various reasons. Those reasons is what you can learn from this terrible experience. How they answer the questions and how your partner expresses their process of becoming unfaithful is a dialogue that can <b>bring you to have a deeper understanding of your relationship and possibly what was wrong with it. </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">It is possible that the answers you receive are going to be hard to hear or sometimes even untrue. Other times, they will never satisfy your curiosity about what went on, or how or when or how many times. But, they might also <b>make you realize that there was something lacking in the relationship</b> <b>or your sex life</b>. That you might have betrayed them in other ways and never gave it a second thought.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b>Let\'s not start pointing the blame towards the person that was cheated on with this discussion</b>. The importance is to take the time to listen on both sides about how this came to be in the relationship and maybe, how you could even repair it.\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s1600/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\"><img title=\"infidelity\" src=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s320/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\" alt=\"sexual desire, infidelity\" width=\"320\" height=\"180\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Infidelity is a very complex process that couples need to explore deeply before taking a decision</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What questions should you ask?</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The time of day, the number of calls, the where and the who are not questions that will alleviate the hurt feelings. <b>Actually, they might just make it worst as they don\'t really bring the answers to the questions you are probably not willing to hear.</b> A true dialogue on our partner\'s infidelity is one of the conversations that can be<b> extremely confrontational and requires that we truly listen</b>, even though, we might be the one that needs comfort and listening at that time. The questions that might bring light unto the situation are the following:</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What did you get from having sex with the other person?</li>\r\n 	<li>Was there anything lacking from our relationship and/or sex life?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did you try to talk to me about it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did I listen if you did?</li>\r\n 	<li>How come we never talked about this before?</li>\r\n 	<li>What brought you to do it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Were you thinking of me before, during or after?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are you remorseful for, if you feel it at all?</li>\r\n 	<li>How can we mend this situation from now on?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h4>What to do with the answers</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The discussion with the questions above are most likely things you didn\'t want to hear about yourself or your partner. <b>You might realize how awful of a person your partner is or just how badly you\'ve ignored or hurt them as well</b>. Maybe, a little bit of both. You may want to decide that after the <u>numerous conversation on the issue</u>, that the best thing is to leave the relationship because that is how you will keep your integrity and self-respect. You might also consider that you had a part to play in this, even though you weren\'t the one who made the decision to be unfaithful.  You might have ignored the signs or your responsibilities towards maintaining a fulfilling relationship and sex life.</div>\r\n<div>\r\n<h3>Bringing back the trust</h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Jealousy and possessiveness</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is not uncommon that jealousy and possessiveness will rise up after being so badly wounded in our egos. We seek after being hurt, to feel secure and capable of having some form of control over the situation. It is important that <b>this jealousy and possessiveness don\'t overwhelm your new dynamic </b>after an infidelity. The partner who cheated can help by ensuring the boundaries of the relationship for a while and reassure the other on their actions. It is important though, ensuring does not become the new norm, nor that it binds you and your partner in a prison of insecurity.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>Jealousy and possessiveness are <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/08/jealousy-destroyer-of-couples.html\">common reasons why there is infidelity</a>. Feeling trapped in a relationship you can\'t get out of is sometimes what brings one partner to jump the fence. The partner who has been cheated on must find ways <b>to self-soothe their insecurity and build on a solid-flexible self that makes them a desirable partner to be with</b>. By changing the dynamic in ourselves from being validated by our partner to being self-validating and feeling self-desirable makes for a strong foundation in a couple.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Recognizing the hurt and remorse</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The partner who cheated is often times not remorseful of having been unfaithful, but of hurting their partner. When they were having the affair, they felt alive, desirable and awake. Rarely does someone regret that. <b>Showing true remorse for what we did, demonstrates that we still care about our partner even though we hurt them deeply</b>. The one who had the affair needs to now deal with being the one who has created such pain. You can\'t hurt someone by your actions that you knew would hurt if they found out and then asking them not to talk about it. <b>The person who cheated must face the consequences of his actions and have a mirror of the devastation they created.</b></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is important to note that the one of was cheated on must have the space to talk and process their pain and not just use that time to attack and play the victim towards the other. Coming to terms with such betrayal of what we once assumed was a safe and secure environment takes times. <b>Time that must be used appropriately by expressing and processing the mourning of what will never be the same again. </b></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>Learn more on infidelity</h3>\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2016/02/revenge-the-ugly-side-of-infidelity.html\">Revenge: The Ugly Side of Infidelity</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>', 'Infidelity: Is it really the worst thing that can happen to a couple?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '27-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:12:06', '2017-06-05 23:12:06', '', 27, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/27-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0);
INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(218, 2, '2017-06-06 01:17:26', '2017-06-05 23:17:26', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large; letter-spacing: 0px;\">Put An End to the Suffering</span></h2>\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b> </b></span></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy is an emotion which we do not control, but that we have the power to manage. Some people have excessive jealousy that has important impacts in their different relationships whether they be professional, social, friendly or sexual. On the other hand, some only have issues in one of theses types of relationships. Since jealousy can influence multiple aspects of our lives and each have a variety of dynamics that differ, we will be focusing more on sexual and loving jealousy.</span></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<h3><b>Impacts of jealousy on couple\'s relationships</b></h3>\n<div><b> </b></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">It isn\'t necessary to have excessive jealousy for the couple to have difficulties with the matter. Jealousy always emanates from insecurities from the person who feels it, but will blame others to justify their behaviours. This creates conflicts about trust, unjustified accusations, interrogations, an excessive need to be reassured of the other persons loyalty and limiting someone\'s freedom. Certain people or couples will even go as far as try to limit the other persons thinking by demanding they do not fantasize about other people than them as they would consider it cheating or just feel bad about it. They can limit the other persons social activities and who they can hang out with to maintain the potential of infidelity as low as possible. Theses examples are even more frequent when both partners are jealous.</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"><b> </b></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These restrictions demonstrate that their is a lack of self-esteem and trust towards one\'s partner that will have dire consequences in the long run if the couple remains together. Eventually, the partners don\'t feel they have freedom in the relationship and they eventually can\'t stand it anymore, even though they might both be imposing their jealousy on the other. Inevitably, fights will start to emerge more and more about this issue and others more or less related so as to jeopardize the false harmony they originally thought they had. There are couples who maintain a relationship in this type of dynamic. Although, you have to ask yourself if you are truly happy? How happy can you be when you are feeling constantly insecure about your partner\'s whereabouts and who they hang out with? Do you feel free to do what you would like, without having to ask your partner\'s permission? How do you appreciate the feeling of constantly being monitored by your partner and having to do the same?</div>\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px;\"></div>\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\n\n<style type=\"text/css\">\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\n</label>\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\n</div>\n</form></div>\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\n\n&nbsp;\n<div></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Jealousy will eventually create dissatisfaction for one or both partners. Jealousy can decrease one\'s sexual desire and affection for the other if the jealousy and the consequences pile up. The partner who isn\'t jealous will not want to reassure the other continuously, will get fed up about the interrogations, they will start lying to get the illusion that they have freedom. For most people, the feeling of constantly having to reassure the other persons insecurities takes a toll on the admiration of the other and pity tends to replace it.</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s1600/irrational-jealousy.jpg\"><img title=\"jealous in couples\" src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s320/irrational-jealousy.jpg\" alt=\"Stop, jealousy, sexologist, psychotherapist, montreal\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\n</tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Stop the behaviour, to eventually stop the feelings of jealousy</td>\n</tr>\n</tbody>\n</table>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\n\n<span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></span>\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">How to stop jealousy?</span></h3>\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">\n\n<b></b>Jealousy is an emotion that makes us suffer and it can be quite hard to manage. We more often prefer to get rid of it than to explore its origins, because the exploration of its origins leads to things that we prefer to remain blind to ourselves about our personalities. Jealousy is not only a destructive force for our relationships, but also ourselves. It feeds on us from the inside to be exteriorized by nefarious behaviours in our relationship. First off, like any other interpersonal difficulty, we must take responsibility for what we contribute to the dynamic. We must stop putting the blame on our partner and confront our own fears and insecurities about the issue. We must accept and recognize our own personal value as a person and a partner in the relationship. We must learn to validate ourselves and self-soothe rather than constantly ask our partner to do it. This task is difficult and requires some time to master, especially since humans are more easily capable of being hurt and insulted, as well as rejected than remembering compliments and signs of affection and love. A jealous person tends to need to be constantly reassured and validated by their lover rather than doing it themselves.\n\nJealous behaviours exist primarily to seek out a sense of love from our partner. In fact, a person with low self-esteem needs to constantly be reassured of the love from others. They will sometimes use inadequate and harmful ways to obtain this false sense of love and affection from others. When we are validated and appreciated by others this temporarily soothes are insecurities. In the long run, this can have negative impacts on the couple who want to be satisfied on a personal, relational and sexual level. Couples where both partners are capable of validating themselves by acknowledging their own value, faults and their partner\'s will avoid the suffering emotion of jealousy.\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\n\nRecognizing our strengths and accepting our weaknesses is a very hard task for some. It may sometimes require the help of a <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/index.php?/en/pages/contact\">sex therapist</a>  in <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/01/therapeutic-process-with-a-sex-therapist.html\">therapy</a>. Here a few reflexions to have about your relationship dynamic:\n<ul>\n 	<li>What do you bring to your relationship and your partner?</li>\n 	<li>What does your partner appreciate from you?</li>\n 	<li>What makes you feel insecure and impacts your jealousy?</li>\n 	<li>What are the ways you self-validate to feel good about yourself?</li>\n 	<li>How could you better manage your jealousy?</li>\n</ul>\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Many false perceptions and beliefs about relationships can create difficulties with jealousy. First, we must understand that we cannot answer all our partner\'s needs and vice versa. It is unrealistic to believe that, as some needs must be fulfilled by oneself or other people such as family, friends, work, etc. This reality is hard for many as it requires that we are not the ONE &amp; ONLY, UNIQUE person in our partner\'s life. This search of feeling profoundly unique in someone else\'s eyes creates an expectation that is only bound to create frustration and resentment. In the case where this perception and expectation is destroyed by the realities of being in a relationship, behaviours of jealousy arise to try to maintain our false belief about being unique. People who are jealous have a hard time accepting this fact about relationships. It is undeniable that lovers do bring unique elements to each other, but it is an error to think that we can answer every single need our partner has as well as our own.</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">What to remember</span></h3>\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy brings lots of distress in a couple, and endangers its stability as well as sexual and personal satisfaction. Jealous behaviours are to be avoided at all cost:</span></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By recognizing our own qualities and accepting our shortcomings; </b></span></h4>\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By mainly validating ourselves rather wait for our partner to do it;</b></span></h4>\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By having realistic expectations and perceptions of our partner, ourselves and relationships. </b></span><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></h4>\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">People who want to live a satisfying relationship and sex life must work on all aspects of their jealousy to overcome the inevitable downfall of the relationship. This self-healing will only make you feel better about yourself and to be more appreciated by your partner. </span>\n<span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">\n</span> <span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>To be able to love another person, one must first learn how to love oneself in every aspect. </b><b> </b></span></div>\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\nLearn more about the author\n\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like theses? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div>\n<div>\n\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\n\n<style type=\"text/css\">\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\n</label>\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\n</div>\n</form></div>\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\n<div></div>\n<div></div>\n</div>\n</div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div></div>\n<div></div>', 'How to stop being jealous?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '28-autosave-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:17:26', '2017-06-05 23:17:26', '', 28, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/28-autosave-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(219, 2, '2017-06-06 01:14:13', '2017-06-05 23:14:13', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large; letter-spacing: 0px;\">Put An End to the Suffering</span></h2>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy is an emotion which we do not control, but that we have the power to manage. Some people have excessive jealousy that has important impacts in their different relationships whether they be professional, social, friendly or sexual. On the other hand, some only have issues in one of theses types of relationships. Since jealousy can influence multiple aspects of our lives and each have a variety of dynamics that differ, we will be focusing more on sexual and loving jealousy.</span></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><b>Impacts of jealousy on couple\'s relationships</b></h3>\r\n<div><b> </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">It isn\'t necessary to have excessive jealousy for the couple to have difficulties with the matter. Jealousy always emanates from insecurities from the person who feels it, but will blame others to justify their behaviours. This creates conflicts about trust, unjustified accusations, interrogations, an excessive need to be reassured of the other persons loyalty and limiting someone\'s freedom. Certain people or couples will even go as far as try to limit the other persons thinking by demanding they do not fantasize about other people than them as they would consider it cheating or just feel bad about it. They can limit the other persons social activities and who they can hang out with to maintain the potential of infidelity as low as possible. Theses examples are even more frequent when both partners are jealous.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"><b> </b></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These restrictions demonstrate that their is a lack of self-esteem and trust towards one\'s partner that will have dire consequences in the long run if the couple remains together. Eventually, the partners don\'t feel they have freedom in the relationship and they eventually can\'t stand it anymore, even though they might both be imposing their jealousy on the other. Inevitably, fights will start to emerge more and more about this issue and others more or less related so as to jeopardize the false harmony they originally thought they had. There are couples who maintain a relationship in this type of dynamic. Although, you have to ask yourself if you are truly happy? How happy can you be when you are feeling constantly insecure about your partner\'s whereabouts and who they hang out with? Do you feel free to do what you would like, without having to ask your partner\'s permission? How do you appreciate the feeling of constantly being monitored by your partner and having to do the same?</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />\r\n	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />\r\n	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br />\r\n</style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Jealousy will eventually create dissatisfaction for one or both partners. Jealousy can decrease one\'s sexual desire and affection for the other if the jealousy and the consequences pile up. The partner who isn\'t jealous will not want to reassure the other continuously, will get fed up about the interrogations, they will start lying to get the illusion that they have freedom. For most people, the feeling of constantly having to reassure the other persons insecurities takes a toll on the admiration of the other and pity tends to replace it.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s1600/irrational-jealousy.jpg\"><img title=\"jealous in couples\" src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s320/irrational-jealousy.jpg\" alt=\"Stop, jealousy, sexologist, psychotherapist, montreal\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Stop the behaviour, to eventually stop the feelings of jealousy</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">How to stop jealousy?</span></h3>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b></b>Jealousy is an emotion that makes us suffer and it can be quite hard to manage. We more often prefer to get rid of it than to explore its origins, because the exploration of its origins leads to things that we prefer to remain blind to ourselves about our personalities. Jealousy is not only a destructive force for our relationships, but also ourselves. It feeds on us from the inside to be exteriorized by nefarious behaviours in our relationship. First off, like any other interpersonal difficulty, we must take responsibility for what we contribute to the dynamic. We must stop putting the blame on our partner and confront our own fears and insecurities about the issue. We must accept and recognize our own personal value as a person and a partner in the relationship. We must learn to validate ourselves and self-soothe rather than constantly ask our partner to do it. This task is difficult and requires some time to master, especially since humans are more easily capable of being hurt and insulted, as well as rejected than remembering compliments and signs of affection and love. A jealous person tends to need to be constantly reassured and validated by their lover rather than doing it themselves.\r\n\r\nJealous behaviours exist primarily to seek out a sense of love from our partner. In fact, a person with low self-esteem needs to constantly be reassured of the love from others. They will sometimes use inadequate and harmful ways to obtain this false sense of love and affection from others. When we are validated and appreciated by others this temporarily soothes are insecurities. In the long run, this can have negative impacts on the couple who want to be satisfied on a personal, relational and sexual level. Couples where both partners are capable of validating themselves by acknowledging their own value, faults and their partner\'s will avoid the suffering emotion of jealousy.\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nRecognizing our strengths and accepting our weaknesses is a very hard task for some. It may sometimes require the help of a <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/index.php?/en/pages/contact\">sexologist</a> in <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2014/01/therapeutic-process-with-a-sex-therapist.html\">therapy</a>. Here a a fews reflexions to have about your relationship dynamic:\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What do you bring to your relationship and your partner?</li>\r\n 	<li>What does your partner appreciate from you?</li>\r\n 	<li>What makes you feel insecure and impacts your jealousy?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are the ways you self-valide to feel good about yourself?</li>\r\n 	<li>How could you better manage your jealousy?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Many false perceptions and beliefs about relationships can create difficulties with jealousy. First, we must understand that we cannot answer all our partner\'s needs and vice versa. It is unrealistic to believe that, as some needs must be fulfilled by oneself or other people such as family, friends, work, etc. This reality is hard for many as it requires that we are not the ONE &amp; ONLY, UNIQUE person in our partner\'s life. This search of feeling profoundly unique in someone else\'s eyes creates an expectation that is only bound to create frustration and resentment. In the case where this perception and expectation is destroyed by the realities of being in a relationship, behaviours of jealousy arise to try to maintain our false belief about being unique. People who are jealous have a hard time accepting this fact about relationships. It is undeniable that lovers do bring unique elements to each other, but it is an error to think that we can answer every single need our partner has as well as our own.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">What to remember</span></h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy brings lots of distress in a couple, and endangers its stability as well as sexual and personal satisfaction. Jealous behaviours are to be avoided at all cost:</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By recognizing our own qualities and accepting our shortcomings; </b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By mainly validating ourselves rather wait for our partner to do it;</b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By having realistic expectations and perceptions of our partner, ourselves and relationships. </b></span><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">People who want to live a satisfying relationship and sex life must work on all aspects of their jealousy to overcome the inevitable downfall of the relationship. This self-healing will only make you feel better about yourself and to be more appreciated by your partner. </span>\r\n<span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">\r\n</span> <span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>To be able to love another person, one must first learn how to love oneself in every aspect. </b><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like theses? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div><!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />\r\n	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />\r\n	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br />\r\n</style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>', 'How to stop being jealous?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '28-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:14:13', '2017-06-05 23:14:13', '', 28, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/28-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0);
INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(220, 2, '2017-06-06 01:15:36', '2017-06-05 23:15:36', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large; letter-spacing: 0px;\">Put An End to the Suffering</span></h2>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy is an emotion which we do not control, but that we have the power to manage. Some people have excessive jealousy that has important impacts in their different relationships whether they be professional, social, friendly or sexual. On the other hand, some only have issues in one of theses types of relationships. Since jealousy can influence multiple aspects of our lives and each have a variety of dynamics that differ, we will be focusing more on sexual and loving jealousy.</span></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><b>Impacts of jealousy on couple\'s relationships</b></h3>\r\n<div><b> </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">It isn\'t necessary to have excessive jealousy for the couple to have difficulties with the matter. Jealousy always emanates from insecurities from the person who feels it, but will blame others to justify their behaviours. This creates conflicts about trust, unjustified accusations, interrogations, an excessive need to be reassured of the other persons loyalty and limiting someone\'s freedom. Certain people or couples will even go as far as try to limit the other persons thinking by demanding they do not fantasize about other people than them as they would consider it cheating or just feel bad about it. They can limit the other persons social activities and who they can hang out with to maintain the potential of infidelity as low as possible. Theses examples are even more frequent when both partners are jealous.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"><b> </b></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These restrictions demonstrate that their is a lack of self-esteem and trust towards one\'s partner that will have dire consequences in the long run if the couple remains together. Eventually, the partners don\'t feel they have freedom in the relationship and they eventually can\'t stand it anymore, even though they might both be imposing their jealousy on the other. Inevitably, fights will start to emerge more and more about this issue and others more or less related so as to jeopardize the false harmony they originally thought they had. There are couples who maintain a relationship in this type of dynamic. Although, you have to ask yourself if you are truly happy? How happy can you be when you are feeling constantly insecure about your partner\'s whereabouts and who they hang out with? Do you feel free to do what you would like, without having to ask your partner\'s permission? How do you appreciate the feeling of constantly being monitored by your partner and having to do the same?</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Jealousy will eventually create dissatisfaction for one or both partners. Jealousy can decrease one\'s sexual desire and affection for the other if the jealousy and the consequences pile up. The partner who isn\'t jealous will not want to reassure the other continuously, will get fed up about the interrogations, they will start lying to get the illusion that they have freedom. For most people, the feeling of constantly having to reassure the other persons insecurities takes a toll on the admiration of the other and pity tends to replace it.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s1600/irrational-jealousy.jpg\"><img title=\"jealous in couples\" src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s320/irrational-jealousy.jpg\" alt=\"Stop, jealousy, sexologist, psychotherapist, montreal\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Stop the behaviour, to eventually stop the feelings of jealousy</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></span>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">How to stop jealousy?</span></h3>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b></b>Jealousy is an emotion that makes us suffer and it can be quite hard to manage. We more often prefer to get rid of it than to explore its origins, because the exploration of its origins leads to things that we prefer to remain blind to ourselves about our personalities. Jealousy is not only a destructive force for our relationships, but also ourselves. It feeds on us from the inside to be exteriorized by nefarious behaviours in our relationship. First off, like any other interpersonal difficulty, we must take responsibility for what we contribute to the dynamic. We must stop putting the blame on our partner and confront our own fears and insecurities about the issue. We must accept and recognize our own personal value as a person and a partner in the relationship. We must learn to validate ourselves and self-soothe rather than constantly ask our partner to do it. This task is difficult and requires some time to master, especially since humans are more easily capable of being hurt and insulted, as well as rejected than remembering compliments and signs of affection and love. A jealous person tends to need to be constantly reassured and validated by their lover rather than doing it themselves.\r\n\r\nJealous behaviours exist primarily to seek out a sense of love from our partner. In fact, a person with low self-esteem needs to constantly be reassured of the love from others. They will sometimes use inadequate and harmful ways to obtain this false sense of love and affection from others. When we are validated and appreciated by others this temporarily soothes are insecurities. In the long run, this can have negative impacts on the couple who want to be satisfied on a personal, relational and sexual level. Couples where both partners are capable of validating themselves by acknowledging their own value, faults and their partner\'s will avoid the suffering emotion of jealousy.\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nRecognizing our strengths and accepting our weaknesses is a very hard task for some. It may sometimes require the help of a <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/index.php?/en/pages/contact\">sex therapist</a>  in <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2014/01/therapeutic-process-with-a-sex-therapist.html\">therapy</a>. Here a few reflexions to have about your relationship dynamic:\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What do you bring to your relationship and your partner?</li>\r\n 	<li>What does your partner appreciate from you?</li>\r\n 	<li>What makes you feel insecure and impacts your jealousy?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are the ways you self-validate to feel good about yourself?</li>\r\n 	<li>How could you better manage your jealousy?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Many false perceptions and beliefs about relationships can create difficulties with jealousy. First, we must understand that we cannot answer all our partner\'s needs and vice versa. It is unrealistic to believe that, as some needs must be fulfilled by oneself or other people such as family, friends, work, etc. This reality is hard for many as it requires that we are not the ONE &amp; ONLY, UNIQUE person in our partner\'s life. This search of feeling profoundly unique in someone else\'s eyes creates an expectation that is only bound to create frustration and resentment. In the case where this perception and expectation is destroyed by the realities of being in a relationship, behaviours of jealousy arise to try to maintain our false belief about being unique. People who are jealous have a hard time accepting this fact about relationships. It is undeniable that lovers do bring unique elements to each other, but it is an error to think that we can answer every single need our partner has as well as our own.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">What to remember</span></h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy brings lots of distress in a couple, and endangers its stability as well as sexual and personal satisfaction. Jealous behaviours are to be avoided at all cost:</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By recognizing our own qualities and accepting our shortcomings; </b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By mainly validating ourselves rather wait for our partner to do it;</b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By having realistic expectations and perceptions of our partner, ourselves and relationships. </b></span><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">People who want to live a satisfying relationship and sex life must work on all aspects of their jealousy to overcome the inevitable downfall of the relationship. This self-healing will only make you feel better about yourself and to be more appreciated by your partner. </span>\r\n<span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">\r\n</span> <span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>To be able to love another person, one must first learn how to love oneself in every aspect. </b><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like theses? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>', 'How to stop being jealous?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '28-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:15:36', '2017-06-05 23:15:36', '', 28, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/28-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(221, 2, '2017-06-06 01:18:42', '2017-06-05 23:18:42', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large; letter-spacing: 0px;\">Put An End to the Suffering</span></h2>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy is an emotion which we do not control, but that we have the power to manage. Some people have excessive jealousy that has important impacts in their different relationships whether they be professional, social, friendly or sexual. On the other hand, some only have issues in one of theses types of relationships. Since jealousy can influence multiple aspects of our lives and each have a variety of dynamics that differ, we will be focusing more on sexual and loving jealousy.</span></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><b>Impacts of jealousy on couple\'s relationships</b></h3>\r\n<div><b> </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">It isn\'t necessary to have excessive jealousy for the couple to have difficulties with the matter. Jealousy always emanates from insecurities from the person who feels it, but will blame others to justify their behaviours. This creates conflicts about trust, unjustified accusations, interrogations, an excessive need to be reassured of the other persons loyalty and limiting someone\'s freedom. Certain people or couples will even go as far as try to limit the other persons thinking by demanding they do not fantasize about other people than them as they would consider it cheating or just feel bad about it. They can limit the other persons social activities and who they can hang out with to maintain the potential of infidelity as low as possible. Theses examples are even more frequent when both partners are jealous.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"><b> </b></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These restrictions demonstrate that their is a lack of self-esteem and trust towards one\'s partner that will have dire consequences in the long run if the couple remains together. Eventually, the partners don\'t feel they have freedom in the relationship and they eventually can\'t stand it anymore, even though they might both be imposing their jealousy on the other. Inevitably, fights will start to emerge more and more about this issue and others more or less related so as to jeopardize the false harmony they originally thought they had. There are couples who maintain a relationship in this type of dynamic. Although, you have to ask yourself if you are truly happy? How happy can you be when you are feeling constantly insecure about your partner\'s whereabouts and who they hang out with? Do you feel free to do what you would like, without having to ask your partner\'s permission? How do you appreciate the feeling of constantly being monitored by your partner and having to do the same?</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Jealousy will eventually create dissatisfaction for one or both partners. Jealousy can decrease one\'s sexual desire and affection for the other if the jealousy and the consequences pile up. The partner who isn\'t jealous will not want to reassure the other continuously, will get fed up about the interrogations, they will start lying to get the illusion that they have freedom. For most people, the feeling of constantly having to reassure the other person\'s insecurities takes a toll on the admiration of the other and pity tends to replace it.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s1600/irrational-jealousy.jpg\"><img title=\"jealous in couples\" src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s320/irrational-jealousy.jpg\" alt=\"Stop, jealousy, sexologist, psychotherapist, montreal\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Stop the behaviour, to eventually stop the feelings of jealousy</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></span>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">How to stop jealousy?</span></h3>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b></b>Jealousy is an emotion that makes us suffer and it can be quite hard to manage. We more often prefer to get rid of it than to explore its origins, because the exploration of its origins leads to things that we prefer to remain blind to ourselves about our personalities. Jealousy is not only a destructive force for our relationships but also ourselves. It feeds on us from the inside to be exteriorized by nefarious behaviours in our relationship. First off, like any other interpersonal difficulty, we must take responsibility for what we contribute to the dynamic. We must stop putting the blame on our partner and confront our own fears and insecurities about the issue. We must accept and recognize our own personal value as a person and a partner in the relationship. We must learn to validate ourselves and self-soothe rather than constantly ask our partner to do it. This task is difficult and requires some time to master, especially since humans are more easily capable of being hurt and insulted, as well as rejected than remembering compliments and signs of affection and love. A jealous person tends to need to be constantly reassured and validated by their lover rather than doing it themselves.\r\n\r\nJealous behaviours exist primarily to seek out a sense of love from our partner. In fact, a person with low self-esteem needs to constantly be reassured of the love from others. They will sometimes use inadequate and harmful ways to obtain this false sense of love and affection from others. When we are validated and appreciated by others this temporarily soothes are insecurities. In the long run, this can have negative impacts on the couple who want to be satisfied on a personal, relational and sexual level. Couples where both partners are capable of validating themselves by acknowledging their own value, faults and their partner\'s will avoid the suffering emotion of jealousy.\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nRecognizing our strengths and accepting our weaknesses is a very hard task for some. It may sometimes require the help of a <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/index.php?/en/pages/contact\">sex therapist</a>  in <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/01/therapeutic-process-with-a-sex-therapist.html\">therapy</a>. Here a few reflexions to have about your relationship dynamic:\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What do you bring to your relationship and your partner?</li>\r\n 	<li>What does your partner appreciate from you?</li>\r\n 	<li>What makes you feel insecure and impacts your jealousy?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are the ways you self-validate to feel good about yourself?</li>\r\n 	<li>How could you better manage your jealousy?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Many false perceptions and beliefs about relationships can create difficulties with jealousy. First, we must understand that we cannot answer all our partner\'s needs and vice versa. It is unrealistic to believe that, as some needs must be fulfilled by oneself or other people such as family, friends, work, etc. This reality is hard for many as it requires that we are not the ONE &amp; ONLY, UNIQUE person in our partner\'s life. This search of feeling profoundly unique in someone else\'s eyes creates an expectation that is only bound to create frustration and resentment. In the case where this perception and expectation is destroyed by the realities of being in a relationship, behaviours of jealousy arise to try to maintain our false belief about being unique. People who are jealous have a hard time accepting this fact about relationships. It is undeniable that lovers do bring unique elements to each other, but it is an error to think that we can answer every single need our partner has as well as our own.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">What to remember</span></h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy brings lots of distress in a couple and endangers its stability as well as sexual and personal satisfaction. Jealous behaviours are to be avoided at all cost:</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By recognizing our own qualities and accepting our shortcomings; </b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By mainly validating ourselves rather wait for our partner to do it;</b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By having realistic expectations and perceptions of our partner, ourselves and relationships. </b></span><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">People who want to live a satisfying relationship and sex life must work on all aspects of their jealousy to overcome the inevitable downfall of the relationship. This self-healing will only make you feel better about yourself and to be more appreciated by your partner. </span>\r\n<span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">\r\n</span> <span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>To be able to love another person, one must first learn how to love oneself in every aspect. </b><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like theses? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>', 'How to stop being jealous?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '28-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 01:18:42', '2017-06-05 23:18:42', '', 28, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/28-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0);
INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(379, 2, '2017-09-29 20:07:47', '2017-09-29 18:07:47', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large; letter-spacing: 0px;\">Put An End to the Suffering</span></h2>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy is an emotion which we do not control, but that we have the power to manage. Some people have excessive jealousy that has important impacts in their different relationships whether they be professional, social, friendly or sexual. On the other hand, some only have issues in one of theses types of relationships. Since jealousy can influence multiple aspects of our lives and each have a variety of dynamics that differ, we will be focusing more on sexual and loving jealousy.</span></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><b>Impacts of jealousy on couple\'s relationships</b></h3>\r\n<div><b> </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">It isn\'t necessary to have excessive jealousy for the couple to have difficulties with the matter. Jealousy always emanates from insecurities from the person who feels it, but will blame others to justify their behaviours. This creates conflicts about trust, unjustified accusations, interrogations, an excessive need to be reassured of the other persons loyalty and limiting someone\'s freedom. Certain people or couples will even go as far as try to limit the other persons thinking by demanding they do not fantasize about other people than them as they would consider it cheating or just feel bad about it. They can limit the other persons social activities and who they can hang out with to maintain the potential of infidelity as low as possible. Theses examples are even more frequent when both partners are jealous.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"><b> </b></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These restrictions demonstrate that their is a lack of self-esteem and trust towards one\'s partner that will have dire consequences in the long run if the couple remains together. Eventually, the partners don\'t feel they have freedom in the relationship and they eventually can\'t stand it anymore, even though they might both be imposing their jealousy on the other. Inevitably, fights will start to emerge more and more about this issue and others more or less related so as to jeopardize the false harmony they originally thought they had. There are couples who maintain a relationship in this type of dynamic. Although, you have to ask yourself if you are truly happy? How happy can you be when you are feeling constantly insecure about your partner\'s whereabouts and who they hang out with? Do you feel free to do what you would like, without having to ask your partner\'s permission? How do you appreciate the feeling of constantly being monitored by your partner and having to do the same?</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Jealousy will eventually create dissatisfaction for one or both partners. Jealousy can decrease one\'s sexual desire and affection for the other if the jealousy and the consequences pile up. The partner who isn\'t jealous will not want to reassure the other continuously, will get fed up about the interrogations, they will start lying to get the illusion that they have freedom. For most people, the feeling of constantly having to reassure the other person\'s insecurities takes a toll on the admiration of the other and pity tends to replace it.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">\r\n</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">How to stop jealousy?</span></h3>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b></b>Jealousy is an emotion that makes us suffer and it can be quite hard to manage. We more often prefer to get rid of it than to explore its origins, because the exploration of its origins leads to things that we prefer to remain blind to ourselves about our personalities. Jealousy is not only a destructive force for our relationships but also ourselves. It feeds on us from the inside to be exteriorized by nefarious behaviours in our relationship. First off, like any other interpersonal difficulty, we must take responsibility for what we contribute to the dynamic. We must stop putting the blame on our partner and confront our own fears and insecurities about the issue. We must accept and recognize our own personal value as a person and a partner in the relationship. We must learn to validate ourselves and self-soothe rather than constantly ask our partner to do it. This task is difficult and requires some time to master, especially since humans are more easily capable of being hurt and insulted, as well as rejected than remembering compliments and signs of affection and love. A jealous person tends to need to be constantly reassured and validated by their lover rather than doing it themselves.\r\n\r\nJealous behaviours exist primarily to seek out a sense of love from our partner. In fact, a person with low self-esteem needs to constantly be reassured of the love from others. They will sometimes use inadequate and harmful ways to obtain this false sense of love and affection from others. When we are validated and appreciated by others this temporarily soothes are insecurities. In the long run, this can have negative impacts on the couple who want to be satisfied on a personal, relational and sexual level. Couples where both partners are capable of validating themselves by acknowledging their own value, faults and their partner\'s will avoid the suffering emotion of jealousy.\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nRecognizing our strengths and accepting our weaknesses is a very hard task for some. It may sometimes require the help of a <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/index.php?/en/pages/contact\">sex therapist</a> in <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/01/therapeutic-process-with-a-sex-therapist.html\">therapy</a>. Here a few reflexions to have about your relationship dynamic:\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What do you bring to your relationship and your partner?</li>\r\n 	<li>What does your partner appreciate from you?</li>\r\n 	<li>What makes you feel insecure and impacts your jealousy?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are the ways you self-validate to feel good about yourself?</li>\r\n 	<li>How could you better manage your jealousy?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Many false perceptions and beliefs about relationships can create difficulties with jealousy. First, we must understand that we cannot answer all our partner\'s needs and vice versa. It is unrealistic to believe that, as some needs must be fulfilled by oneself or other people such as family, friends, work, etc. This reality is hard for many as it requires that we are not the ONE &amp; ONLY, UNIQUE person in our partner\'s life. This search of feeling profoundly unique in someone else\'s eyes creates an expectation that is only bound to create frustration and resentment. In the case where this perception and expectation is destroyed by the realities of being in a relationship, behaviours of jealousy arise to try to maintain our false belief about being unique. People who are jealous have a hard time accepting this fact about relationships. It is undeniable that lovers do bring unique elements to each other, but it is an error to think that we can answer every single need our partner has as well as our own.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">What to remember</span></h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy brings lots of distress in a couple and endangers its stability as well as sexual and personal satisfaction. Jealous behaviours are to be avoided at all cost:</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By recognizing our own qualities and accepting our shortcomings; </b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By mainly validating ourselves rather wait for our partner to do it;</b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By having realistic expectations and perceptions of our partner, ourselves and relationships. </b></span><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">People who want to live a satisfying relationship and sex life must work on all aspects of their jealousy to overcome the inevitable downfall of the relationship. This self-healing will only make you feel better about yourself and to be more appreciated by your partner. </span>\r\n<span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">\r\n</span> <span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>To be able to love another person, one must first learn how to love oneself in every aspect. </b><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like theses? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>', 'How to stop being jealous?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '28-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-09-29 20:07:47', '2017-09-29 18:07:47', '', 28, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/09/28-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(222, 2, '2017-06-06 16:55:14', '2017-06-06 14:55:14', '<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">How to grow from an infidelity</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>The deep trauma of infidelity</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">No one wants to experience infidelity from their partner. The hurt feelings, the betrayal, the hate, the resentment, the unanswered questions, the feeling of being undesirable in their eyes, the competitiveness from the other partner. Nothing from infidelity seems to be positive and the first thing we want to do is throw them to the curb. Which is what most of your friends and family will tell you to do. <b>For some reason, you aren\'t sure if you want to leave and you might even feel guilty about it. </b>What would explain such ambivalence towards someone who profoundly hurt your feelings and broke your trust. What if this infidelity was the best thing that could happen to your sex life and relationship?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Learning from the infidelity</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Now don\'t get me wrong! I am not and never will be pro-infidelity. It can be compared to a traumatic experience to learn that your partner <b>betrayed you and chose egotistically</b> to satisfy their needs with another person. Infidelity is unfortunately not that uncommon and men as well as women do it for various reasons. Those reasons is what you can learn from this terrible experience. How they answer the questions and how your partner expresses their process of becoming unfaithful is a dialogue that can <b>bring you to have a deeper understanding of your relationship and possibly what was wrong with it. </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">It is possible that the answers you receive are going to be hard to hear or sometimes even untrue. Other times, they will never satisfy your curiosity about what went on, or how or when or how many times. But, they might also <b>make you realize that there was something lacking in the relationship</b> <b>or your sex life</b>. That you might have betrayed them in other ways and never gave it a second thought.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b>Let\'s not start pointing the blame towards the person that was cheated on with this discussion</b>. The importance is to take the time to listen on both sides about how this came to be in the relationship and maybe, how you could even repair it.\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s1600/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\"><img title=\"infidelity\" src=\"https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DfEf7gBGtgs/VrlTCoL1BXI/AAAAAAAAAyc/DDuvBeZeWOI/s320/Love-Triangle-infidelity.png\" alt=\"sexual desire, infidelity\" width=\"320\" height=\"180\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Infidelity is a very complex process that couples need to explore deeply before taking a decision</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What questions should you ask?</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The time of day, the number of calls, the where and the who are not questions that will alleviate the hurt feelings. <b>Actually, they might just make it worst as they don\'t really bring the answers to the questions you are probably not willing to hear.</b> A true dialogue on our partner\'s infidelity is one of the conversations that can be<b> extremely confrontational and requires that we truly listen</b>, even though, we might be the one that needs comfort and listening at that time. The questions that might bring light unto the situation are the following:</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What did you get from having sex with the other person?</li>\r\n 	<li>Was there anything lacking from our relationship and/or sex life?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did you try to talk to me about it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did I listen if you did?</li>\r\n 	<li>How come we never talked about this before?</li>\r\n 	<li>What brought you to do it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Were you thinking of me before, during or after?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are you remorseful for, if you feel it at all?</li>\r\n 	<li>How can we mend this situation from now on?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h4>What to do with the answers</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The discussion with the questions above are most likely things you didn\'t want to hear about yourself or your partner. <b>You might realize how awful of a person your partner is or just how badly you\'ve ignored or hurt them as well</b>. Maybe, a little bit of both. You may want to decide that after the <u>numerous conversation on the issue</u>, that the best thing is to leave the relationship because that is how you will keep your integrity and self-respect. You might also consider that you had a part to play in this, even though you weren\'t the one who made the decision to be unfaithful.  You might have ignored the signs or your responsibilities towards maintaining a fulfilling relationship and sex life.</div>\r\n<div>\r\n<h3>Bringing back the trust</h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Jealousy and possessiveness</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is not uncommon that jealousy and possessiveness will rise up after being so badly wounded in our egos. We seek after being hurt, to feel secure and capable of having some form of control over the situation. It is important that <b>this jealousy and possessiveness don\'t overwhelm your new dynamic </b>after an infidelity. The partner who cheated can help by ensuring the boundaries of the relationship for a while and reassure the other on their actions. It is important though, ensuring does not become the new norm, nor that it binds you and your partner in a prison of insecurity.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>Jealousy and possessiveness are <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/08/jealousy-destroyer-of-couples.html\">common reasons why there is infidelity</a>. Feeling trapped in a relationship you can\'t get out of is sometimes what brings one partner to jump the fence. The partner who has been cheated on must find ways <b>to self-soothe their insecurity and build on a solid-flexible self that makes them a desirable partner to be with</b>. By changing the dynamic in ourselves from being validated by our partner to being self-validating and feeling self-desirable makes for a strong foundation in a couple.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Recognizing the hurt and remorse</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The partner who cheated is often times not remorseful of having been unfaithful, but of hurting their partner. When they were having the affair, they felt alive, desirable and awake. Rarely does someone regret that. <b>Showing true remorse for what we did, demonstrates that we still care about our partner even though we hurt them deeply</b>. The one who had the affair needs to now deal with being the one who has created such pain. You can\'t hurt someone by your actions that you knew would hurt if they found out and then asking them not to talk about it. <b>The person who cheated must face the consequences of his actions and have a mirror of the devastation they created.</b></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is important to note that the one of was cheated on must have the space to talk and process their pain and not just use that time to attack and play the victim towards the other. Coming to terms with such betrayal of what we once assumed was a safe and secure environment takes times. <b>Time that must be used appropriately by expressing and processing the mourning of what will never be the same again. </b></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>Learn more on infidelity</h3>\r\n<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2016/02/revenge-the-ugly-side-of-infidelity.html\">Revenge: The Ugly Side of Infidelity</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>', 'Infidelity: Is it really the worst thing that can happen to a couple?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '27-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 16:55:14', '2017-06-06 14:55:14', '', 27, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/27-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(392, 2, '2017-09-30 00:11:04', '2017-09-29 22:11:04', '<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">How to grow from an infidelity</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>The deep trauma of infidelity</h3>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">No one wants to experience infidelity from their partner. The hurt feelings, the betrayal, the hate, the resentment, the unanswered questions, the feeling of being undesirable in their eyes, the competitiveness from the other partner. Nothing from infidelity seems to be positive and the first thing we want to do is throw them to the curb. Which is what most of your friends and family will tell you to do. <b>For some reason, you aren\'t sure if you want to leave and you might even feel guilty about it. </b>What would explain such ambivalence towards someone who profoundly hurt your feelings and broke your trust. What if this infidelity was the best thing that could happen to your sex life and relationship?</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">Learning from the infidelity</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Now don\'t get me wrong! I am not and never will be pro-infidelity. It can be compared to a traumatic experience to learn that your partner <b>betrayed you and chose egotistically</b> to satisfy their needs with another person. Infidelity is unfortunately not that uncommon and men as well as women do it for various reasons. Those reasons is what you can learn from this terrible experience. How they answer the questions and how your partner expresses their process of becoming unfaithful is a dialogue that can <b>bring you to have a deeper understanding of your relationship and possibly what was wrong with it. </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">It is possible that the answers you receive are going to be hard to hear or sometimes even untrue. Other times, they will never satisfy your curiosity about what went on, or how or when or how many times. But, they might also <b>make you realize that there was something lacking in the relationship</b> <b>or your sex life</b>. That you might have betrayed them in other ways and never gave it a second thought.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b>Let\'s not start pointing the blame towards the person that was cheated on with this discussion</b>. The importance is to take the time to listen on both sides about how this came to be in the relationship and maybe, how you could even repair it.\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What questions should you ask?</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">The time of day, the number of calls, the where and the who are not questions that will alleviate the hurt feelings. <b>Actually, they might just make it worst as they don\'t really bring the answers to the questions you are probably not willing to hear.</b> A true dialogue on our partner\'s infidelity is one of the conversations that can be<b> extremely confrontational and requires that we truly listen</b>, even though, we might be the one that needs comfort and listening at that time. The questions that might bring light unto the situation are the following:</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What did you get from having sex with the other person?</li>\r\n 	<li>Was there anything lacking from our relationship and/or sex life?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did you try to talk to me about it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Did I listen if you did?</li>\r\n 	<li>How come we never talked about this before?</li>\r\n 	<li>What brought you to do it?</li>\r\n 	<li>Were you thinking of me before, during or after?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are you remorseful for, if you feel it at all?</li>\r\n 	<li>How can we mend this situation from now on?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h4>What to do with the answers</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The discussion with the questions above are most likely things you didn\'t want to hear about yourself or your partner. <b>You might realize how awful of a person your partner is or just how badly you\'ve ignored or hurt them as well</b>. Maybe, a little bit of both. You may want to decide that after the <u>numerous conversation on the issue</u>, that the best thing is to leave the relationship because that is how you will keep your integrity and self-respect. You might also consider that you had a part to play in this, even though you weren\'t the one who made the decision to be unfaithful.  You might have ignored the signs or your responsibilities towards maintaining a fulfilling relationship and sex life.</div>\r\n<div>\r\n<h3>Bringing back the trust</h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Jealousy and possessiveness</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is not uncommon that jealousy and possessiveness will rise up after being so badly wounded in our egos. We seek after being hurt, to feel secure and capable of having some form of control over the situation. It is important that <b>this jealousy and possessiveness don\'t overwhelm your new dynamic </b>after an infidelity. The partner who cheated can help by ensuring the boundaries of the relationship for a while and reassure the other on their actions. It is important though, ensuring does not become the new norm, nor that it binds you and your partner in a prison of insecurity.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>Jealousy and possessiveness are <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/08/jealousy-destroyer-of-couples.html\">common reasons why there is infidelity</a>. Feeling trapped in a relationship you can\'t get out of is sometimes what brings one partner to jump the fence. The partner who has been cheated on must find ways <b>to self-soothe their insecurity and build on a solid-flexible self that makes them a desirable partner to be with</b>. By changing the dynamic in ourselves from being validated by our partner to being self-validating and feeling self-desirable makes for a strong foundation in a couple.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h4>Recognizing the hurt and remorse</h4>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>The partner who cheated is often times not remorseful of having been unfaithful, but of hurting their partner. When they were having the affair, they felt alive, desirable and awake. Rarely does someone regret that. <b>Showing true remorse for what we did, demonstrates that we still care about our partner even though we hurt them deeply</b>. The one who had the affair needs to now deal with being the one who has created such pain. You can\'t hurt someone by your actions that you knew would hurt if they found out and then asking them not to talk about it. <b>The person who cheated must face the consequences of his actions and have a mirror of the devastation they created.</b></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>It is important to note that the one of was cheated on must have the space to talk and process their pain and not just use that time to attack and play the victim towards the other. Coming to terms with such betrayal of what we once assumed was a safe and secure environment takes times. <b>Time that must be used appropriately by expressing and processing the mourning of what will never be the same again. </b></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>Learn more on infidelity</h3>\r\n<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2016/02/revenge-the-ugly-side-of-infidelity.html\">Revenge: The Ugly Side of Infidelity</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>', 'Infidelity: Is it really the worst thing that can happen to a couple?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '27-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-09-30 00:11:04', '2017-09-29 22:11:04', '', 27, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/09/27-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0);
INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(223, 2, '2017-06-06 16:56:11', '2017-06-06 14:56:11', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large; letter-spacing: 0px;\">Put An End to the Suffering</span></h2>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy is an emotion which we do not control, but that we have the power to manage. Some people have excessive jealousy that has important impacts in their different relationships whether they be professional, social, friendly or sexual. On the other hand, some only have issues in one of theses types of relationships. Since jealousy can influence multiple aspects of our lives and each have a variety of dynamics that differ, we will be focusing more on sexual and loving jealousy.</span></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><b>Impacts of jealousy on couple\'s relationships</b></h3>\r\n<div><b> </b></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">It isn\'t necessary to have excessive jealousy for the couple to have difficulties with the matter. Jealousy always emanates from insecurities from the person who feels it, but will blame others to justify their behaviours. This creates conflicts about trust, unjustified accusations, interrogations, an excessive need to be reassured of the other persons loyalty and limiting someone\'s freedom. Certain people or couples will even go as far as try to limit the other persons thinking by demanding they do not fantasize about other people than them as they would consider it cheating or just feel bad about it. They can limit the other persons social activities and who they can hang out with to maintain the potential of infidelity as low as possible. Theses examples are even more frequent when both partners are jealous.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"><b> </b></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These restrictions demonstrate that their is a lack of self-esteem and trust towards one\'s partner that will have dire consequences in the long run if the couple remains together. Eventually, the partners don\'t feel they have freedom in the relationship and they eventually can\'t stand it anymore, even though they might both be imposing their jealousy on the other. Inevitably, fights will start to emerge more and more about this issue and others more or less related so as to jeopardize the false harmony they originally thought they had. There are couples who maintain a relationship in this type of dynamic. Although, you have to ask yourself if you are truly happy? How happy can you be when you are feeling constantly insecure about your partner\'s whereabouts and who they hang out with? Do you feel free to do what you would like, without having to ask your partner\'s permission? How do you appreciate the feeling of constantly being monitored by your partner and having to do the same?</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Jealousy will eventually create dissatisfaction for one or both partners. Jealousy can decrease one\'s sexual desire and affection for the other if the jealousy and the consequences pile up. The partner who isn\'t jealous will not want to reassure the other continuously, will get fed up about the interrogations, they will start lying to get the illusion that they have freedom. For most people, the feeling of constantly having to reassure the other person\'s insecurities takes a toll on the admiration of the other and pity tends to replace it.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s1600/irrational-jealousy.jpg\"><img title=\"jealous in couples\" src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gqfY53eegbA/UYZf8aWRlxI/AAAAAAAAAIg/hMgI00yNT0U/s320/irrational-jealousy.jpg\" alt=\"Stop, jealousy, sexologist, psychotherapist, montreal\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Stop the behaviour, to eventually stop the feelings of jealousy</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></span>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">How to stop jealousy?</span></h3>\r\n<div><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<b></b>Jealousy is an emotion that makes us suffer and it can be quite hard to manage. We more often prefer to get rid of it than to explore its origins, because the exploration of its origins leads to things that we prefer to remain blind to ourselves about our personalities. Jealousy is not only a destructive force for our relationships but also ourselves. It feeds on us from the inside to be exteriorized by nefarious behaviours in our relationship. First off, like any other interpersonal difficulty, we must take responsibility for what we contribute to the dynamic. We must stop putting the blame on our partner and confront our own fears and insecurities about the issue. We must accept and recognize our own personal value as a person and a partner in the relationship. We must learn to validate ourselves and self-soothe rather than constantly ask our partner to do it. This task is difficult and requires some time to master, especially since humans are more easily capable of being hurt and insulted, as well as rejected than remembering compliments and signs of affection and love. A jealous person tends to need to be constantly reassured and validated by their lover rather than doing it themselves.\r\n\r\nJealous behaviours exist primarily to seek out a sense of love from our partner. In fact, a person with low self-esteem needs to constantly be reassured of the love from others. They will sometimes use inadequate and harmful ways to obtain this false sense of love and affection from others. When we are validated and appreciated by others this temporarily soothes are insecurities. In the long run, this can have negative impacts on the couple who want to be satisfied on a personal, relational and sexual level. Couples where both partners are capable of validating themselves by acknowledging their own value, faults and their partner\'s will avoid the suffering emotion of jealousy.\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nRecognizing our strengths and accepting our weaknesses is a very hard task for some. It may sometimes require the help of a <a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/index.php?/en/pages/contact\">sex therapist</a> in <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/01/therapeutic-process-with-a-sex-therapist.html\">therapy</a>. Here a few reflexions to have about your relationship dynamic:\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li>What do you bring to your relationship and your partner?</li>\r\n 	<li>What does your partner appreciate from you?</li>\r\n 	<li>What makes you feel insecure and impacts your jealousy?</li>\r\n 	<li>What are the ways you self-validate to feel good about yourself?</li>\r\n 	<li>How could you better manage your jealousy?</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">Many false perceptions and beliefs about relationships can create difficulties with jealousy. First, we must understand that we cannot answer all our partner\'s needs and vice versa. It is unrealistic to believe that, as some needs must be fulfilled by oneself or other people such as family, friends, work, etc. This reality is hard for many as it requires that we are not the ONE &amp; ONLY, UNIQUE person in our partner\'s life. This search of feeling profoundly unique in someone else\'s eyes creates an expectation that is only bound to create frustration and resentment. In the case where this perception and expectation is destroyed by the realities of being in a relationship, behaviours of jealousy arise to try to maintain our false belief about being unique. People who are jealous have a hard time accepting this fact about relationships. It is undeniable that lovers do bring unique elements to each other, but it is an error to think that we can answer every single need our partner has as well as our own.</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h3><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">What to remember</span></h3>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">Jealousy brings lots of distress in a couple and endangers its stability as well as sexual and personal satisfaction. Jealous behaviours are to be avoided at all cost:</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By recognizing our own qualities and accepting our shortcomings; </b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By mainly validating ourselves rather wait for our partner to do it;</b></span></h4>\r\n<h4><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>By having realistic expectations and perceptions of our partner, ourselves and relationships. </b></span><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"> </span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">People who want to live a satisfying relationship and sex life must work on all aspects of their jealousy to overcome the inevitable downfall of the relationship. This self-healing will only make you feel better about yourself and to be more appreciated by your partner. </span>\r\n<span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\">\r\n</span> <span style=\"letter-spacing: 0px;\"><b>To be able to love another person, one must first learn how to love oneself in every aspect. </b><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px; min-height: 19px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like theses? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>', 'How to stop being jealous?', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '28-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 16:56:11', '2017-06-06 14:56:11', '', 28, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/28-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(224, 2, '2017-06-06 17:00:22', '2017-06-06 15:00:22', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">Importance of defining fidelity in your couple</span></h2>\n<div></div>\n<div><span style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">Fidelity is defined as the respect of an agreement with another person. In most loving relationships, there exist a form of fidelity between partners, even in polyamory. Although, what one person thinks is adultery, the other person might not, as the confines of fidelity are wide and large. We can even change our own perception of it as we grow older and we perceive alternate ways of being in our relationship. </span>\n<span style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">The continuum of behaviours that is considered adultery is long and the combinations are endless. Certain individuals consider that fantasizing on another person than their partner is cheating, while others require penetrative sex for it to be cheating. Others will need an emotional attachment, but sexual attraction is considered fine. Sometimes, fidelity isn\'t defined by one\'s behaviour but more about one\'s intentions. The examples that we could give are numerous and vary from one relationship to the next. </span></span>\n<span style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">\n</span></span><span style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">For that reason, it is very important for couples to exchange on their perception of fidelity. An indispensable discussion that is often forgotten in serious relationships. Some will even avoid having it by fear of having different opinions that could ultimately lead to not even starting the relationship or creating an awkward moment. This can demonstrate an <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy-part-2.html\">uneasiness about intimacy</a>. It is also important to talk about what reactions and consequences when faced with one of the partners acting out and cheating on the other (couples therapy, break up, acceptance, reflecting on the continuation of the relation, etc.). We can even exchange on telling each other or not about the cheating and how you and your partner would want to find out about it. This clarifies each other\'s points of views on the matter and determines if we agree on the implications of committing to the relationship before hand. </span></span>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">Hard discussion</span></h3>\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\n\nFidelity touches our most fundamental values as individuals. They can remind us of very painful memories of our past about being cheated on or if we cheated on someone. This can bring back feelings of betrayal, lost and major deceptions. We can also face very different point of views by having this discussion with a new flame at the beginning of the relationship about what fidelity entails. These differences can make one of the partners insecure, generally, the one that has the most restrictive definition of fidelity. It will also show how much respect each partner has towards the other person\'s opinion on the matter and how they will listen and understand. It shows as well, how flexible we are about our own perception of fidelity or rigidity on the matter.\n\n</div>\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\n<div>\n<h2></h2>\n<div>\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n</div>\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RoNvhM8uQ5M/UWTAWdrySkI/AAAAAAAAAHk/RtfhFDakRg0/s1600/jealous-man.jpg\"><img title=\"jealous behavior\" src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RoNvhM8uQ5M/UWTAWdrySkI/AAAAAAAAAHk/RtfhFDakRg0/s1600/jealous-man.jpg\" alt=\"jealousy, couple therapy, sexologist, psychotherapist\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\n</tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Do you know what your agreement with your partner is?</td>\n</tr>\n</tbody>\n</table>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></span>\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;\">\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">We can also assume that most couples have very similar definitions of fidelity and the discussion doesn\'t really create any sort of conflict between them. In situations where limits are clear, jealousy has less chance of being prevalent in the couple\'s dynamic. If the perceptions, behaviours, intentions and acts are respected by both parties, trust normally takes precedence in the relationship. Even though jealousy is a universal human emotion, it doesn\'t have any use in a healthy relationship.</div>\n</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">How to manage differences about fidelity</span></h3>\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Nobody wants to be betrayed, especially by one\'s lover, and feel the horrible emotions that come with it. When there is a fundamental issue about what each considers fidelity, there is a real need to reflect on how the relationship will work under such conditions. Sometimes we have differences because our perception of fidelity are more based on our insecurities and lack of self-esteem than actual values. Therefore, it might be important to work on oneself about these issues. We may also want to look at what are those differences and think about which ones we can actually tolerate. What exactly are the differences? How do they make you feel? How will you react if they ever come to be? What is each partner ready to work on and change about the issue? What if you can\'t come to an understanding? How do you picture this relationship evolving with that reality?</span>\n<span lang=\"FR\">\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">Since fidelity is part of almost every loving relationship that is long term, it is of utmost importance to have a discussion on our intentions in the relationship. This discussion, even though it might be a hard one and even stop the relationship from flourishing even before it starts, often avoids meaningless fighting and feelings of jealousy. On top of that, it clarifies the commitment each partner is taking before embarking on the relationship. Unfortunately, some people may still feel jealousy even though, the partners had this discussion. </span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\nLearn more about the author\n\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div></div>\n<div></div>\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\n\n<style type=\"text/css\">\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />\n	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />\n	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br />\n</style>\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\n</label>\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\n</div>\n</form></div>\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->', 'Fidelity &amp; Jealousy', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '29-autosave-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 17:00:22', '2017-06-06 15:00:22', '', 29, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/29-autosave-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(225, 2, '2017-06-06 17:00:29', '2017-06-06 15:00:29', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">Importance of defining fidelity in your couple</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div><span style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">Fidelity is defined as the respect of an agreement with another person. In most loving relationships, there exist a form of fidelity between partners, even in polyamory. Although, what one person thinks is adultery, the other person might not, as the confines of fidelity are wide and large. We can even change our own perception of it as we grow older and we perceive alternate ways of being in our relationship. </span>\r\n<span style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">The continuum of behaviours that is considered adultery is long and the combinations are endless. Certain individuals consider that fantasizing on another person than their partner is cheating, while others require penetrative sex for it to be cheating. Others will need an emotional attachment, but sexual attraction is considered fine. Sometimes, fidelity isn\'t defined by one\'s behaviour but more about one\'s intentions. The examples that we could give are numerous and vary from one relationship to the next. </span></span>\r\n<span style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">\r\n</span></span><span style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">For that reason, it is very important for couples to exchange on their perception of fidelity. An indispensable discussion that is often forgotten in serious relationships. Some will even avoid having it by fear of having different opinions that could ultimately lead to not even starting the relationship or creating an awkward moment. This can demonstrate an <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy-part-2.html\">uneasiness about intimacy</a>. It is also important to talk about what reactions and consequences when faced with one of the partners acting out and cheating on the other (couples therapy, break up, acceptance, reflecting on the continuation of the relation, etc.). We can even exchange on telling each other or not about the cheating and how you and your partner would want to find out about it. This clarifies each other\'s points of views on the matter and determines if we agree on the implications of committing to the relationship before hand. </span></span>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">Hard discussion</span></h3>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nFidelity touches our most fundamental values as individuals. They can remind us of very painful memories of our past about being cheated on or if we cheated on someone. This can bring back feelings of betrayal, lost and major deceptions. We can also face very different point of views by having this discussion with a new flame at the beginning of the relationship about what fidelity entails. These differences can make one of the partners insecure, generally, the one that has the most restrictive definition of fidelity. It will also show how much respect each partner has towards the other person\'s opinion on the matter and how they will listen and understand. It shows as well, how flexible we are about our own perception of fidelity or rigidity on the matter.\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n<div>\r\n<h2></h2>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RoNvhM8uQ5M/UWTAWdrySkI/AAAAAAAAAHk/RtfhFDakRg0/s1600/jealous-man.jpg\"><img title=\"jealous behavior\" src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RoNvhM8uQ5M/UWTAWdrySkI/AAAAAAAAAHk/RtfhFDakRg0/s1600/jealous-man.jpg\" alt=\"jealousy, couple therapy, sexologist, psychotherapist\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">Do you know what your agreement with your partner is?</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></span>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">We can also assume that most couples have very similar definitions of fidelity and the discussion doesn\'t really create any sort of conflict between them. In situations where limits are clear, jealousy has less chance of being prevalent in the couple\'s dynamic. If the perceptions, behaviours, intentions and acts are respected by both parties, trust normally takes precedence in the relationship. Even though jealousy is a universal human emotion, it doesn\'t have any use in a healthy relationship.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">How to manage differences about fidelity</span></h3>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Nobody wants to be betrayed, especially by one\'s lover, and feel the horrible emotions that come with it. When there is a fundamental issue about what each considers fidelity, there is a real need to reflect on how the relationship will work under such conditions. Sometimes we have differences because our perception of fidelity are more based on our insecurities and lack of self-esteem than actual values. Therefore, it might be important to work on oneself about these issues. We may also want to look at what are those differences and think about which ones we can actually tolerate. What exactly are the differences? How do they make you feel? How will you react if they ever come to be? What is each partner ready to work on and change about the issue? What if you can\'t come to an understanding? How do you picture this relationship evolving with that reality?</span>\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">Since fidelity is part of almost every loving relationship that is long term, it is of utmost importance to have a discussion on our intentions in the relationship. This discussion, even though it might be a hard one and even stop the relationship from flourishing even before it starts, often avoids meaningless fighting and feelings of jealousy. On top of that, it clarifies the commitment each partner is taking before embarking on the relationship. Unfortunately, some people may still feel jealousy even though, the partners had this discussion. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />\r\n	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />\r\n	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br />\r\n</style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->', 'Fidelity &amp; Jealousy', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '29-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 17:00:29', '2017-06-06 15:00:29', '', 29, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/29-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0);
INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(412, 2, '2017-10-20 02:54:01', '2017-10-20 00:54:01', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">Importance of defining fidelity in your couple</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div><span style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">Fidelity is defined as the respect of an agreement with another person. In most loving relationships, there exist a form of fidelity between partners, even in polyamory. Although, what one person thinks is adultery, the other person might not, as the confines of fidelity are wide and large. We can even change our own perception of it as we grow older and we perceive alternate ways of being in our relationship. </span>\r\n<span style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">The continuum of behaviours that is considered adultery is long and the combinations are endless. Certain individuals consider that fantasizing on another person than their partner is cheating, while others require penetrative sex for it to be cheating. Others will need an emotional attachment, but sexual attraction is considered fine. Sometimes, fidelity isn\'t defined by one\'s behaviour but more about one\'s intentions. The examples that we could give are numerous and vary from one relationship to the next. </span></span>\r\n<span style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">\r\n</span></span><span style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">For that reason, it is very important for couples to exchange on their perception of fidelity. An indispensable discussion that is often forgotten in serious relationships. Some will even avoid having it by fear of having different opinions that could ultimately lead to not even starting the relationship or creating an awkward moment. This can demonstrate an <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy-part-2.html\">uneasiness about intimacy</a>. It is also important to talk about what reactions and consequences when faced with one of the partners acting out and cheating on the other (couples therapy, break up, acceptance, reflecting on the continuation of the relation, etc.). We can even exchange on telling each other or not about the cheating and how you and your partner would want to find out about it. This clarifies each other\'s points of views on the matter and determines if we agree on the implications of committing to the relationship before hand. </span></span>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">Hard discussion</span></h3>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nFidelity touches our most fundamental values as individuals. They can remind us of very painful memories of our past about being cheated on or if we cheated on someone. This can bring back feelings of betrayal, lost and major deceptions. We can also face very different point of views by having this discussion with a new flame at the beginning of the relationship about what fidelity entails. These differences can make one of the partners insecure, generally, the one that has the most restrictive definition of fidelity. It will also show how much respect each partner has towards the other person\'s opinion on the matter and how they will listen and understand. It shows as well, how flexible we are about our own perception of fidelity or rigidity on the matter.\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n<div>\r\n<h2></h2>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\nWe can also assume that most couples have very similar definitions of fidelity and the discussion doesn\'t really create any sort of conflict between them. In situations where limits are clear, jealousy has less chance of being prevalent in the couple\'s dynamic. If the perceptions, behaviours, intentions and acts are respected by both parties, trust normally takes precedence in the relationship. Even though jealousy is a universal human emotion, it doesn\'t have any use in a healthy relationship.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">How to manage differences about fidelity</span></h3>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Nobody wants to be betrayed, especially by one\'s lover, and feel the horrible emotions that come with it. When there is a fundamental issue about what each considers fidelity, there is a real need to reflect on how the relationship will work under such conditions. Sometimes we have differences because our perception of fidelity are more based on our insecurities and lack of self-esteem than actual values. Therefore, it might be important to work on oneself about these issues. We may also want to look at what are those differences and think about which ones we can actually tolerate. What exactly are the differences? How do they make you feel? How will you react if they ever come to be? What is each partner ready to work on and change about the issue? What if you can\'t come to an understanding? How do you picture this relationship evolving with that reality?</span>\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">Since fidelity is part of almost every loving relationship that is long term, it is of utmost importance to have a discussion on our intentions in the relationship. This discussion, even though it might be a hard one and even stop the relationship from flourishing even before it starts, often avoids meaningless fighting and feelings of jealousy. On top of that, it clarifies the commitment each partner is taking before embarking on the relationship. Unfortunately, some people may still feel jealousy even though, the partners had this discussion. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->', 'Fidelity &amp; Jealousy', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '29-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-10-20 02:54:01', '2017-10-20 00:54:01', '', 29, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/10/29-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(226, 2, '2017-06-06 17:06:24', '2017-06-06 15:06:24', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">What is jealousy?</span></h2>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Jealousy is define as an emotion that makes the person suffer when they are afraid that they will be replaced or cheated on by their partner when they seek exclusivity from that person. It is different than envy which is an emotion that demonstrates lust for someone else\'s happiness. In other words, jealousy is the fear of losing what we already have and envy is the wanting of things that we would want. The envious person is in state of lacking something who seeks to fulfill that need (envy of a kiss, a touch, of being love, of having sex, etc.). On the other hand, people who are jealous are fearful of losing a state of well being that they already have with another person.</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo.jpg\"><img title=\"jealousy\" src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo-300x262.jpg\" alt=\"sexual, jealousy, relationship, jealous\" width=\"320\" height=\"279\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\n</tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">We all feel it, but we all need to deal with it</td>\n</tr>\n</tbody>\n</table>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">A Universal Feeling but Ultimately Useless!</span></h3>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Jealousy is a universal emotion among human beings that we have all felt one day or another. That small or very big sensation in our stomach that makes us feel uneasy, even though sometimes we wish it wasn\'t there. Jealousy is extremely present in loving and sexual relationships, where it can even be glamorized as something good. Although even if it is universal, jealousy is completely useless in loving relationships. We can find that there is a difference in that aspect regarding genders (Harris, 2003; Weghosrt, 19882)</span><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">. More specifically, men tend to be more threaten by sexual conquest of their partners, while women are more scared of losing their partner\'s to another lover. This tends to be changing in recent years with gender roles evolution. </span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">Myths On Jealousy</span></h3>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Proof of someone\'s love </span></u></span></h4>\n</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We often hear people justifying their jealousy by advocating it is a demonstration of one\'s love towards their partner\'s. First, we must make a point very clear:<u> jealousy is not a proof of love</u>. On the contrary, it is a lack of love for one\'s self. A person who feels jealous demonstrates a lack of self-confidence and imagines that they will or can be replaced when the opportunity might present itself. This implies that we consider others to be a menace to the stability of our couple. We show our worries, our fears and apprehensions when we express our jealousy in front of our partner. Inversely, a person with a high self-esteem (no-jealousy) has a feeling of security in their relationship and they demonstrate their love (seen by the satisfaction in the couple) rather than by jealousy (feeling of being insecure). </span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>Being Jealous Protects me From Being Cheated On</u></span></h4>\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><u> </u></span></div>\n</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">Some will explain that their jealousy protects them from been cheated on by their partners. Once again, this could not be further from the truth. Jealousy brings interrogations, unjustified suspicions, constant surveillance and a lack of trust between partners. A perfect recipe for an unsatisfying relationship and constant bickering and fighting! These behaviors tend to push away our partner towards another person because they become dissatisfied with the relationship with the jealous person. We can then attest that jealousy creates the worst fear and what they are trying to ultimately avoid: losing their partner to someone else. It is not unlikely that partners constantly barraged by the other\'s jealous behavior wants to leave the relationship and sometimes by cheating. Therefore, jealousy can sometimes cause someone to cheat. Of course, the decision remains in the hands of the one who committed the act, but nevertheless, jealous partners should consider how they might have pushed the other into their own worst fears.</div>\n&nbsp;\n<div>\n<div>\n\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\n\n<style type=\"text/css\">\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\n</label>\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\n</div>\n</form></div>\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\n<div></div>\n<div></div>\n</div>\n</div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Complete absence of jealousy demonstrates a detachment and indifference </span></u></span></h4>\n</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">« I love that my partner is jealous, it demonstrates how they are concerned about me». This typical citation is as false as saying jealousy is a proof of love. Couples who seek to make their partner\'s feel jealous are searching to be falsely reassured about their relationship. They seek attention when they feel there is a distance being created between them. We, therefore, believe that our partner showing their jealousy is demonstrating attachment towards the relationship and that they aren\'t indifferent to us. When we think about it, there are healthier ways of demonstrating our attachment towards each other. Considering that jealousy is a feeling that makes us suffer, why would we ever want our partner to feel it in any way, shape or form and more precisely in the name of love? Sounds contradictory doesn\'t it...well it is! In a stable and healthy relationship, we feel love and attachment towards each other in a good way, not by feeling insecure and scared of losing the other person, with destructive behaviors of jealousy. </span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>I trust my partner, I just don\'t trust other people</u></span></h4>\n</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\n\n<span lang=\"FR\">A lot of jealous people will affirm that they trust their partner, but not the people surrounding him such as friends, colleagues and the like. We imagine that if someone flirts or tries anything with our partner, they have no other choice but to cheat. It is a strange way to think indeed. We must come quickly to the conclusion that we always have a choice in our lives to do or not to do something. If someone flirts, tries to kiss you or any other thing related to affection or sex, there is always the possibility of telling that person that we are in a committed relationship and ask them to stop. This responsibility is solely of the person who is engaged in a relationship. Our partner\'s are not territories we need to protect from outside intrusions. They can do that by themselves. </span>\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge.jpeg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge-300x200.jpeg\" width=\"320\" height=\"213\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We must also consider that the commitment that two partners have taken together about being loyal in the relationship is only between those two people. First of all, others might not be aware of this loyalty between you and perceives your partner as free game. Secondly, they don\'t have the obligation to follow the loyalty you have put forward as they never committed to it, your partner did. Thirdly, we have no control over what others do, and that includes your partner. We must therefore trust your partner that he will put the limits required by your engagement to be loyal and not commit adultery. </span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">If you don\'t trust your partner to put those limits, maybe you need to have a serious talk about it with them or reflect by yourself the importance of your commitment towards each other on that regard. A few questions to ask yourself about this issue. </span></div>\n<ul>\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do you imagine your partner in a situation where they are being flirted with?</span></li>\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do they react? Do they cheat?</span></li>\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How would you react in the same situation (you being flirted by someone)?</span></li>\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Do you put your limits or would you cheat?</span></li>\n</ul>\n</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Depending on your answers to theses questions, you might have realized that you would have cheated if placed in a situation where you could do it. Sometimes, the person that is jealous is actually projecting on their partner their own desire to cheat and they need others to put limits on them so they don\'t cross the line. But most of the time, they restrict their partners instead to soothe their own anxieties, rather than learning to establish their limits in similar situations. </span></div>\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">What you need to remember</span></h3>\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">In conclusion, it is important to understand that feelings of jealousy will probably always be present in one way or another. Rarely will we see a person that is entirely confident in every aspect of their lives and never feel jealous. We all have experiences where we were hurt and made us feel bad about ourselves and it created jealousy.</div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship-300x200.jpg\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Although, what is also very important to understand is that our feelings must not decrease our relationship satisfaction because we feel insecure about ourselves. We must all learn to self-sooth our feelings and let our partner be who they are, rather than limiting each other in different aspects of your lives together. It is fundamental that you work on these issues rather than justify your jealousy as being a good thing for the stability of your couple, as it does the complete opposite of that. </span>\n<span lang=\"FR\">\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\n</span></div>\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois-278x300.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\nLearn more about the author\n\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\n\n<style type=\"text/css\">\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />\n	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />\n	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br />\n</style>\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\n</label>\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\n</div>\n</form></div>\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\n<div></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div></div>\n<div></div>\n<div></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Harris, Christine. 2003. A Review of Sex Differences in Sexual Jealousy, Including Self-Report Data, Psychophysiological Responses, Interpersonal Violence, and Morbid Jealousy <i>Personality and Social Psychology Review</i>. Vol. 7. No. 2, 102-128.</div>\n<div></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 6pt;\"><span style=\"font-size: 10pt;\">Weghorst, Suzanne. 1982. Male Sexual Jealousy. <span style=\"color: black;\">Ethology &amp; Sociobiology Volume 3, Issue 1, 11-27.</span></span></div>', 'Jealousy: Destroyer of couples', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '30-autosave-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 17:06:24', '2017-06-06 15:06:24', '', 30, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/30-autosave-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(227, 2, '2017-06-06 17:06:33', '2017-06-06 15:06:33', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">What is jealousy?</span></h2>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Jealousy is define as an emotion that makes the person suffer when they are afraid that they will be replaced or cheated on by their partner when they seek exclusivity from that person. It is different than envy which is an emotion that demonstrates lust for someone else\'s happiness. In other words, jealousy is the fear of losing what we already have and envy is the wanting of things that we would want. The envious person is in state of lacking something who seeks to fulfill that need (envy of a kiss, a touch, of being love, of having sex, etc.). On the other hand, people who are jealous are fearful of losing a state of well being that they already have with another person.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo.jpg\"><img title=\"jealousy\" src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo-300x262.jpg\" alt=\"sexual, jealousy, relationship, jealous\" width=\"320\" height=\"279\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">We all feel it, but we all need to deal with it</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">A Universal Feeling but Ultimately Useless!</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Jealousy is a universal emotion among human beings that we have all felt one day or another. That small or very big sensation in our stomach that makes us feel uneasy, even though sometimes we wish it wasn\'t there. Jealousy is extremely present in loving and sexual relationships, where it can even be glamorized as something good. Although even if it is universal, jealousy is completely useless in loving relationships. We can find that there is a difference in that aspect regarding genders (Harris, 2003; Weghosrt, 19882)</span><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">. More specifically, men tend to be more threaten by sexual conquest of their partners, while women are more scared of losing their partner\'s to another lover. This tends to be changing in recent years with gender roles evolution. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">Myths On Jealousy</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Proof of someone\'s love </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We often hear people justifying their jealousy by advocating it is a demonstration of one\'s love towards their partner\'s. First, we must make a point very clear:<u> jealousy is not a proof of love</u>. On the contrary, it is a lack of love for one\'s self. A person who feels jealous demonstrates a lack of self-confidence and imagines that they will or can be replaced when the opportunity might present itself. This implies that we consider others to be a menace to the stability of our couple. We show our worries, our fears and apprehensions when we express our jealousy in front of our partner. Inversely, a person with a high self-esteem (no-jealousy) has a feeling of security in their relationship and they demonstrate their love (seen by the satisfaction in the couple) rather than by jealousy (feeling of being insecure). </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>Being Jealous Protects me From Being Cheated On</u></span></h4>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><u> </u></span></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">Some will explain that their jealousy protects them from been cheated on by their partners. Once again, this could not be further from the truth. Jealousy brings interrogations, unjustified suspicions, constant surveillance and a lack of trust between partners. A perfect recipe for an unsatisfying relationship and constant bickering and fighting! These behaviors tend to push away our partner towards another person because they become dissatisfied with the relationship with the jealous person. We can then attest that jealousy creates the worst fear and what they are trying to ultimately avoid: losing their partner to someone else. It is not unlikely that partners constantly barraged by the other\'s jealous behavior wants to leave the relationship and sometimes by cheating. Therefore, jealousy can sometimes cause someone to cheat. Of course, the decision remains in the hands of the one who committed the act, but nevertheless, jealous partners should consider how they might have pushed the other into their own worst fears.</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Complete absence of jealousy demonstrates a detachment and indifference </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">« I love that my partner is jealous, it demonstrates how they are concerned about me». This typical citation is as false as saying jealousy is a proof of love. Couples who seek to make their partner\'s feel jealous are searching to be falsely reassured about their relationship. They seek attention when they feel there is a distance being created between them. We, therefore, believe that our partner showing their jealousy is demonstrating attachment towards the relationship and that they aren\'t indifferent to us. When we think about it, there are healthier ways of demonstrating our attachment towards each other. Considering that jealousy is a feeling that makes us suffer, why would we ever want our partner to feel it in any way, shape or form and more precisely in the name of love? Sounds contradictory doesn\'t it...well it is! In a stable and healthy relationship, we feel love and attachment towards each other in a good way, not by feeling insecure and scared of losing the other person, with destructive behaviors of jealousy. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>I trust my partner, I just don\'t trust other people</u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">A lot of jealous people will affirm that they trust their partner, but not the people surrounding him such as friends, colleagues and the like. We imagine that if someone flirts or tries anything with our partner, they have no other choice but to cheat. It is a strange way to think indeed. We must come quickly to the conclusion that we always have a choice in our lives to do or not to do something. If someone flirts, tries to kiss you or any other thing related to affection or sex, there is always the possibility of telling that person that we are in a committed relationship and ask them to stop. This responsibility is solely of the person who is engaged in a relationship. Our partner\'s are not territories we need to protect from outside intrusions. They can do that by themselves. </span>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge.jpeg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge-300x200.jpeg\" width=\"320\" height=\"213\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We must also consider that the commitment that two partners have taken together about being loyal in the relationship is only between those two people. First of all, others might not be aware of this loyalty between you and perceives your partner as free game. Secondly, they don\'t have the obligation to follow the loyalty you have put forward as they never committed to it, your partner did. Thirdly, we have no control over what others do, and that includes your partner. We must therefore trust your partner that he will put the limits required by your engagement to be loyal and not commit adultery. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">If you don\'t trust your partner to put those limits, maybe you need to have a serious talk about it with them or reflect by yourself the importance of your commitment towards each other in that regard. A few questions to ask yourself about this issue. </span></div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do you imagine your partner in a situation where they are being flirted with?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do they react? Do they cheat?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How would you react in the same situation (you being flirted by someone)?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Do you put your limits or would you cheat?</span></li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Depending on your answers to theses questions, you might have realized that you would have cheated if placed in a situation where you could do it. Sometimes, the person that is jealous is actually projecting on their partner their own desire to cheat and they need others to put limits on them so they don\'t cross the line. But most of the time, they restrict their partners instead to soothe their own anxieties, rather than learning to establish their limits in similar situations. </span></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">What you need to remember</span></h3>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">In conclusion, it is important to understand that feelings of jealousy will probably always be present in one way or another. Rarely will we see a person that is entirely confident in every aspect of their lives and never feel jealous. We all have experiences where we were hurt and made us feel bad about ourselves and it created jealousy.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship-300x200.jpg\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Although, what is also very important to understand is that our feelings must not decrease our relationship satisfaction because we feel insecure about ourselves. We must all learn to self-sooth our feelings and let our partner be who they are, rather than limiting each other in different aspects of your lives together. It is fundamental that you work on these issues rather than justify your jealousy as being a good thing for the stability of your couple, as it does the complete opposite of that. </span>\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois-278x300.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />\r\n	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />\r\n	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br />\r\n</style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Harris, Christine. 2003. A Review of Sex Differences in Sexual Jealousy, Including Self-Report Data, Psychophysiological Responses, Interpersonal Violence, and Morbid Jealousy <i>Personality and Social Psychology Review</i>. Vol. 7. No. 2, 102-128.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 6pt;\"><span style=\"font-size: 10pt;\">Weghorst, Suzanne. 1982. Male Sexual Jealousy. <span style=\"color: black;\">Ethology &amp; Sociobiology Volume 3, Issue 1, 11-27.</span></span></div>', 'Jealousy: Destroyer of couples', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '30-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 17:06:33', '2017-06-06 15:06:33', '', 30, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/30-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0);
INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(228, 2, '2017-06-06 17:07:03', '2017-06-06 15:07:03', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">What is jealousy?</span></h2>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Jealousy is define as an emotion that makes the person suffer when they are afraid that they will be replaced or cheated on by their partner when they seek exclusivity from that person. It is different than envy which is an emotion that demonstrates lust for someone else\'s happiness. In other words, jealousy is the fear of losing what we already have and envy is the wanting of things that we would want. The envious person is in state of lacking something who seeks to fulfill that need (envy of a kiss, a touch, of being love, of having sex, etc.). On the other hand, people who are jealous are fearful of losing a state of well being that they already have with another person.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo.jpg\"><img title=\"jealousy\" src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo-300x262.jpg\" alt=\"sexual, jealousy, relationship, jealous\" width=\"320\" height=\"279\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">We all feel it, but we all need to deal with it</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">A Universal Feeling but Ultimately Useless!</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Jealousy is a universal emotion among human beings that we have all felt one day or another. That small or very big sensation in our stomach that makes us feel uneasy, even though sometimes we wish it wasn\'t there. Jealousy is extremely present in loving and sexual relationships, where it can even be glamorized as something good. Although even if it is universal, jealousy is completely useless in loving relationships. We can find that there is a difference in that aspect regarding genders (Harris, 2003; Weghosrt, 19882)</span><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">. More specifically, men tend to be more threaten by sexual conquest of their partners, while women are more scared of losing their partner\'s to another lover. This tends to be changing in recent years with gender roles evolution. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">Myths On Jealousy</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Proof of someone\'s love </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We often hear people justifying their jealousy by advocating it is a demonstration of one\'s love towards their partner\'s. First, we must make a point very clear:<u> jealousy is not a proof of love</u>. On the contrary, it is a lack of love for one\'s self. A person who feels jealous demonstrates a lack of self-confidence and imagines that they will or can be replaced when the opportunity might present itself. This implies that we consider others to be a menace to the stability of our couple. We show our worries, our fears and apprehensions when we express our jealousy in front of our partner. Inversely, a person with a high self-esteem (no-jealousy) has a feeling of security in their relationship and they demonstrate their love (seen by the satisfaction in the couple) rather than by jealousy (feeling of being insecure). </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>Being Jealous Protects me From Being Cheated On</u></span></h4>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><u> </u></span></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">Some will explain that their jealousy protects them from been cheated on by their partners. Once again, this could not be further from the truth. Jealousy brings interrogations, unjustified suspicions, constant surveillance and a lack of trust between partners. A perfect recipe for an unsatisfying relationship and constant bickering and fighting! These behaviors tend to push away our partner towards another person because they become dissatisfied with the relationship with the jealous person. We can then attest that jealousy creates the worst fear and what they are trying to ultimately avoid: losing their partner to someone else. It is not unlikely that partners constantly barraged by the other\'s jealous behavior wants to leave the relationship and sometimes by cheating. Therefore, jealousy can sometimes cause someone to cheat. Of course, the decision remains in the hands of the one who committed the act, but nevertheless, jealous partners should consider how they might have pushed the other into their own worst fears.</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Complete absence of jealousy demonstrates a detachment and indifference </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">« I love that my partner is jealous, it demonstrates how they are concerned about me». This typical citation is as false as saying jealousy is a proof of love. Couples who seek to make their partner\'s feel jealous are searching to be falsely reassured about their relationship. They seek attention when they feel there is a distance being created between them. We, therefore, believe that our partner showing their jealousy is demonstrating attachment towards the relationship and that they aren\'t indifferent to us. When we think about it, there are healthier ways of demonstrating our attachment towards each other. Considering that jealousy is a feeling that makes us suffer, why would we ever want our partner to feel it in any way, shape or form and more precisely in the name of love? Sounds contradictory doesn\'t it...well it is! In a stable and healthy relationship, we feel love and attachment towards each other in a good way, not by feeling insecure and scared of losing the other person, with destructive behaviors of jealousy. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>I trust my partner, I just don\'t trust other people</u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">A lot of jealous people will affirm that they trust their partner, but not the people surrounding him such as friends, colleagues and the like. We imagine that if someone flirts or tries anything with our partner, they have no other choice but to cheat. It is a strange way to think indeed. We must come quickly to the conclusion that we always have a choice in our lives to do or not to do something. If someone flirts, tries to kiss you or any other thing related to affection or sex, there is always the possibility of telling that person that we are in a committed relationship and ask them to stop. This responsibility is solely of the person who is engaged in a relationship. Our partner\'s are not territories we need to protect from outside intrusions. They can do that by themselves. </span>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge.jpeg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge-300x200.jpeg\" width=\"320\" height=\"213\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We must also consider that the commitment that two partners have taken together about being loyal in the relationship is only between those two people. First of all, others might not be aware of this loyalty between you and perceives your partner as free game. Secondly, they don\'t have the obligation to follow the loyalty you have put forward as they never committed to it, your partner did. Thirdly, we have no control over what others do, and that includes your partner. We must therefore trust your partner that he will put the limits required by your engagement to be loyal and not commit adultery. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">If you don\'t trust your partner to put those limits, maybe you need to have a serious talk about it with them or reflect by yourself the importance of your commitment towards each other in that regard. A few questions to ask yourself about this issue. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do you imagine your partner in a situation where they are being flirted with?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do they react? Do they cheat?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How would you react in the same situation (you being flirted by someone)?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Do you put your limits or would you cheat?</span></li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Depending on your answers to theses questions, you might have realized that you would have cheated if placed in a situation where you could do it. Sometimes, the person that is jealous is actually projecting on their partner their own desire to cheat and they need others to put limits on them so they don\'t cross the line. But most of the time, they restrict their partners instead to soothe their own anxieties, rather than learning to establish their limits in similar situations. </span></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">What you need to remember</span></h3>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">In conclusion, it is important to understand that feelings of jealousy will probably always be present in one way or another. Rarely will we see a person that is entirely confident in every aspect of their lives and never feel jealous. We all have experiences where we were hurt and made us feel bad about ourselves and it created jealousy.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship-300x200.jpg\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></span>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Although, what is also very important to understand is that our feelings must not decrease our relationship satisfaction because we feel insecure about ourselves. We must all learn to self-sooth our feelings and let our partner be who they are, rather than limiting each other in different aspects of your lives together. It is fundamental that you work on these issues rather than justify your jealousy as being a good thing for the stability of your couple, as it does the complete opposite of that. </span>\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois-278x300.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Harris, Christine. 2003. A Review of Sex Differences in Sexual Jealousy, Including Self-Report Data, Psychophysiological Responses, Interpersonal Violence, and Morbid Jealousy <i>Personality and Social Psychology Review</i>. Vol. 7. No. 2, 102-128.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 6pt;\"><span style=\"font-size: 10pt;\">Weghorst, Suzanne. 1982. Male Sexual Jealousy. <span style=\"color: black;\">Ethology &amp; Sociobiology Volume 3, Issue 1, 11-27.</span></span></div>', 'Jealousy: Destroyer of couples', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '30-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 17:07:03', '2017-06-06 15:07:03', '', 30, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/30-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(229, 2, '2017-06-06 21:53:36', '2017-06-06 19:53:36', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">What is jealousy?</span></h2>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Jealousy is define as an emotion that makes the person suffer when they are afraid that they will be replaced or cheated on by their partner when they seek exclusivity from that person. It is different than envy which is an emotion that demonstrates lust for someone else\'s happiness. In other words, jealousy is the fear of losing what we already have and envy is the wanting of things that we would want. The envious person is in state of lacking something who seeks to fulfill that need (envy of a kiss, a touch, of being love, of having sex, etc.). On the other hand, people who are jealous are fearful of losing a state of well being that they already have with another person.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo.jpg\"><img title=\"jealousy\" src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo-300x262.jpg\" alt=\"sexual, jealousy, relationship, jealous\" width=\"320\" height=\"279\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">We all feel it, but we all need to deal with it</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">A Universal Feeling but Ultimately Useless!</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Jealousy is a universal emotion among human beings that we have all felt one day or another. That small or very big sensation in our stomach that makes us feel uneasy, even though sometimes we wish it wasn\'t there. Jealousy is extremely present in loving and sexual relationships, where it can even be glamorized as something good. Although even if it is universal, jealousy is completely useless in loving relationships. We can find that there is a difference in that aspect regarding genders (Harris, 2003; Weghosrt, 19882)</span><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">. More specifically, men tend to be more threaten by sexual conquest of their partners, while women are more scared of losing their partner\'s to another lover. This tends to be changing in recent years with gender roles evolution. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">Myths On Jealousy</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Proof of someone\'s love </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We often hear people justifying their jealousy by advocating it is a demonstration of one\'s love towards their partner\'s. First, we must make a point very clear:<u> jealousy is not a proof of love</u>. On the contrary, it is a lack of love for one\'s self. A person who feels jealous demonstrates a lack of self-confidence and imagines that they will or can be replaced when the opportunity might present itself. This implies that we consider others to be a menace to the stability of our couple. We show our worries, our fears and apprehensions when we express our jealousy in front of our partner. Inversely, a person with a high self-esteem (no-jealousy) has a feeling of security in their relationship and they demonstrate their love (seen by the satisfaction in the couple) rather than by jealousy (feeling of being insecure). </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>Being Jealous Protects me From Being Cheated On</u></span></h4>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><u> </u></span></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">Some will explain that their jealousy protects them from been cheated on by their partners. Once again, this could not be further from the truth. Jealousy brings interrogations, unjustified suspicions, constant surveillance and a lack of trust between partners. A perfect recipe for an unsatisfying relationship and constant bickering and fighting! These behaviors tend to push away our partner towards another person because they become dissatisfied with the relationship with the jealous person. We can then attest that jealousy creates the worst fear and what they are trying to ultimately avoid: losing their partner to someone else. It is not unlikely that partners constantly barraged by the other\'s jealous behavior wants to leave the relationship and sometimes by cheating. Therefore, jealousy can sometimes cause someone to cheat. Of course, the decision remains in the hands of the one who committed the act, but nevertheless, jealous partners should consider how they might have pushed the other into their own worst fears.</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Complete absence of jealousy demonstrates a detachment and indifference </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">« I love that my partner is jealous, it demonstrates how they are concerned about me». This typical citation is as false as saying jealousy is a proof of love. Couples who seek to make their partner\'s feel jealous are searching to be falsely reassured about their relationship. They seek attention when they feel there is a distance being created between them. We, therefore, believe that our partner showing their jealousy is demonstrating attachment towards the relationship and that they aren\'t indifferent to us. When we think about it, there are healthier ways of demonstrating our attachment towards each other. Considering that jealousy is a feeling that makes us suffer, why would we ever want our partner to feel it in any way, shape or form and more precisely in the name of love? Sounds contradictory doesn\'t it...well it is! In a stable and healthy relationship, we feel love and attachment towards each other in a good way, not by feeling insecure and scared of losing the other person, with destructive behaviors of jealousy. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>I trust my partner, I just don\'t trust other people</u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">A lot of jealous people will affirm that they trust their partner, but not the people surrounding him such as friends, colleagues and the like. We imagine that if someone flirts or tries anything with our partner, they have no other choice but to cheat. It is a strange way to think indeed. We must come quickly to the conclusion that we always have a choice in our lives to do or not to do something. If someone flirts, tries to kiss you or any other thing related to affection or sex, there is always the possibility of telling that person that we are in a committed relationship and ask them to stop. This responsibility is solely of the person who is engaged in a relationship. Our partner\'s are not territories we need to protect from outside intrusions. They can do that by themselves. </span>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge.jpeg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge-300x200.jpeg\" width=\"320\" height=\"213\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We must also consider that the commitment that two partners have taken together about being loyal in the relationship is only between those two people. First of all, others might not be aware of this loyalty between you and perceives your partner as free game. Secondly, they don\'t have the obligation to follow the loyalty you have put forward as they never committed to it, your partner did. Thirdly, we have no control over what others do, and that includes your partner. We must therefore trust your partner that he will put the limits required by your engagement to be loyal and not commit adultery. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">If you don\'t trust your partner to put those limits, maybe you need to have a serious talk about it with them or reflect by yourself the importance of your commitment towards each other in that regard. A few questions to ask yourself about this issue. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do you imagine your partner in a situation where they are being flirted with?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do they react? Do they cheat?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How would you react in the same situation (you being flirted by someone)?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Do you put your limits or would you cheat?</span></li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Depending on your answers to theses questions, you might have realized that you would have cheated if placed in a situation where you could do it. Sometimes, the person that is jealous is actually projecting on their partner their own desire to cheat and they need others to put limits on them so they don\'t cross the line. But most of the time, they restrict their partners instead to soothe their own anxieties, rather than learning to establish their limits in similar situations. </span></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">What you need to remember</span></h3>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">In conclusion, it is important to understand that feelings of jealousy will probably always be present in one way or another. Rarely will we see a person that is entirely confident in every aspect of their lives and never feel jealous. We all have experiences where we were hurt and made us feel bad about ourselves and it created jealousy.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship-300x200.jpg\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span lang=\"FR\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></span>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Although, what is also very important to understand is that our feelings must not decrease our relationship satisfaction because we feel insecure about ourselves. We must all learn to self-sooth our feelings and let our partner be who they are, rather than limiting each other in different aspects of your lives together. It is fundamental that you work on these issues rather than justify your jealousy as being a good thing for the stability of your couple, as it does the complete opposite of that. </span>\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois-278x300.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Harris, Christine. 2003. A Review of Sex Differences in Sexual Jealousy, Including Self-Report Data, Psychophysiological Responses, Interpersonal Violence, and Morbid Jealousy <i>Personality and Social Psychology Review</i>. Vol. 7. No. 2, 102-128.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 6pt;\"><span style=\"font-size: 10pt;\">Weghorst, Suzanne. 1982. Male Sexual Jealousy. <span style=\"color: black;\">Ethology &amp; Sociobiology Volume 3, Issue 1, 11-27.</span></span></div>', 'Jealousy: Destroyer of couples', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '30-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-06 21:53:36', '2017-06-06 19:53:36', '', 30, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/30-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0);
INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(393, 2, '2017-09-30 00:11:55', '2017-09-29 22:11:55', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">What is jealousy?</span></h2>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Jealousy is define as an emotion that makes the person suffer when they are afraid that they will be replaced or cheated on by their partner when they seek exclusivity from that person. It is different than envy which is an emotion that demonstrates lust for someone else\'s happiness. In other words, jealousy is the fear of losing what we already have and envy is the wanting of things that we would want. The envious person is in state of lacking something who seeks to fulfill that need (envy of a kiss, a touch, of being love, of having sex, etc.). On the other hand, people who are jealous are fearful of losing a state of well being that they already have with another person.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b>\r\n</b><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">A Universal Feeling but Ultimately Useless!</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Jealousy is a universal emotion among human beings that we have all felt one day or another. That small or very big sensation in our stomach that makes us feel uneasy, even though sometimes we wish it wasn\'t there. Jealousy is extremely present in loving and sexual relationships, where it can even be glamorized as something good. Although even if it is universal, jealousy is completely useless in loving relationships. We can find that there is a difference in that aspect regarding genders (Harris, 2003; Weghosrt, 19882)</span><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">. More specifically, men tend to be more threaten by sexual conquest of their partners, while women are more scared of losing their partner\'s to another lover. This tends to be changing in recent years with gender roles evolution. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">Myths On Jealousy</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Proof of someone\'s love </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We often hear people justifying their jealousy by advocating it is a demonstration of one\'s love towards their partner\'s. First, we must make a point very clear:<u> jealousy is not a proof of love</u>. On the contrary, it is a lack of love for one\'s self. A person who feels jealous demonstrates a lack of self-confidence and imagines that they will or can be replaced when the opportunity might present itself. This implies that we consider others to be a menace to the stability of our couple. We show our worries, our fears and apprehensions when we express our jealousy in front of our partner. Inversely, a person with a high self-esteem (no-jealousy) has a feeling of security in their relationship and they demonstrate their love (seen by the satisfaction in the couple) rather than by jealousy (feeling of being insecure). </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>Being Jealous Protects me From Being Cheated On</u></span></h4>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><u> </u></span></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">Some will explain that their jealousy protects them from been cheated on by their partners. Once again, this could not be further from the truth. Jealousy brings interrogations, unjustified suspicions, constant surveillance and a lack of trust between partners. A perfect recipe for an unsatisfying relationship and constant bickering and fighting! These behaviors tend to push away our partner towards another person because they become dissatisfied with the relationship with the jealous person. We can then attest that jealousy creates the worst fear and what they are trying to ultimately avoid: losing their partner to someone else. It is not unlikely that partners constantly barraged by the other\'s jealous behavior wants to leave the relationship and sometimes by cheating. Therefore, jealousy can sometimes cause someone to cheat. Of course, the decision remains in the hands of the one who committed the act, but nevertheless, jealous partners should consider how they might have pushed the other into their own worst fears.</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Complete absence of jealousy demonstrates a detachment and indifference </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">« I love that my partner is jealous, it demonstrates how they are concerned about me». This typical citation is as false as saying jealousy is a proof of love. Couples who seek to make their partner\'s feel jealous are searching to be falsely reassured about their relationship. They seek attention when they feel there is a distance being created between them. We, therefore, believe that our partner showing their jealousy is demonstrating attachment towards the relationship and that they aren\'t indifferent to us. When we think about it, there are healthier ways of demonstrating our attachment towards each other. Considering that jealousy is a feeling that makes us suffer, why would we ever want our partner to feel it in any way, shape or form and more precisely in the name of love? Sounds contradictory doesn\'t it...well it is! In a stable and healthy relationship, we feel love and attachment towards each other in a good way, not by feeling insecure and scared of losing the other person, with destructive behaviors of jealousy. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>I trust my partner, I just don\'t trust other people</u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">A lot of jealous people will affirm that they trust their partner, but not the people surrounding him such as friends, colleagues and the like. We imagine that if someone flirts or tries anything with our partner, they have no other choice but to cheat. It is a strange way to think indeed. We must come quickly to the conclusion that we always have a choice in our lives to do or not to do something. If someone flirts, tries to kiss you or any other thing related to affection or sex, there is always the possibility of telling that person that we are in a committed relationship and ask them to stop. This responsibility is solely of the person who is engaged in a relationship. Our partner\'s are not territories we need to protect from outside intrusions. They can do that by themselves. </span>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge.jpeg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge-300x200.jpeg\" width=\"320\" height=\"213\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We must also consider that the commitment that two partners have taken together about being loyal in the relationship is only between those two people. First of all, others might not be aware of this loyalty between you and perceives your partner as free game. Secondly, they don\'t have the obligation to follow the loyalty you have put forward as they never committed to it, your partner did. Thirdly, we have no control over what others do, and that includes your partner. We must therefore trust your partner that he will put the limits required by your engagement to be loyal and not commit adultery. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">If you don\'t trust your partner to put those limits, maybe you need to have a serious talk about it with them or reflect by yourself the importance of your commitment towards each other in that regard. A few questions to ask yourself about this issue. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do you imagine your partner in a situation where they are being flirted with?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do they react? Do they cheat?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How would you react in the same situation (you being flirted by someone)?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Do you put your limits or would you cheat?</span></li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Depending on your answers to theses questions, you might have realized that you would have cheated if placed in a situation where you could do it. Sometimes, the person that is jealous is actually projecting on their partner their own desire to cheat and they need others to put limits on them so they don\'t cross the line. But most of the time, they restrict their partners instead to soothe their own anxieties, rather than learning to establish their limits in similar situations. </span></div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">What you need to remember</span></h3>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">In conclusion, it is important to understand that feelings of jealousy will probably always be present in one way or another. Rarely will we see a person that is entirely confident in every aspect of their lives and never feel jealous. We all have experiences where we were hurt and made us feel bad about ourselves and it created jealousy.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship-300x200.jpg\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span lang=\"FR\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></span>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Although, what is also very important to understand is that our feelings must not decrease our relationship satisfaction because we feel insecure about ourselves. We must all learn to self-sooth our feelings and let our partner be who they are, rather than limiting each other in different aspects of your lives together. It is fundamental that you work on these issues rather than justify your jealousy as being a good thing for the stability of your couple, as it does the complete opposite of that. </span>\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois-278x300.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Harris, Christine. 2003. A Review of Sex Differences in Sexual Jealousy, Including Self-Report Data, Psychophysiological Responses, Interpersonal Violence, and Morbid Jealousy <i>Personality and Social Psychology Review</i>. Vol. 7. No. 2, 102-128.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 6pt;\"><span style=\"font-size: 10pt;\">Weghorst, Suzanne. 1982. Male Sexual Jealousy. <span style=\"color: black;\">Ethology &amp; Sociobiology Volume 3, Issue 1, 11-27.</span></span></div>', 'Jealousy: Destroyer of couples', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '30-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-09-30 00:11:55', '2017-09-29 22:11:55', '', 30, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/09/30-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(230, 2, '2017-06-07 01:23:18', '2017-06-06 23:23:18', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">What is jealousy?</span></h2>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Jealousy is define as an emotion that makes the person suffer when they are afraid that they will be replaced or cheated on by their partner when they seek exclusivity from that person. It is different than envy which is an emotion that demonstrates lust for someone else\'s happiness. In other words, jealousy is the fear of losing what we already have and envy is the wanting of things that we would want. The envious person is in state of lacking something who seeks to fulfill that need (envy of a kiss, a touch, of being love, of having sex, etc.). On the other hand, people who are jealous are fearful of losing a state of well being that they already have with another person.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo.jpg\"><img title=\"jealousy\" src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/Jealousy_With_Toys_by_Kairi_Danjo_Sanjo-300x262.jpg\" alt=\"sexual, jealousy, relationship, jealous\" width=\"320\" height=\"279\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\">We all feel it, but we all need to deal with it</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">A Universal Feeling but Ultimately Useless!</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Jealousy is a universal emotion among human beings that we have all felt one day or another. That small or very big sensation in our stomach that makes us feel uneasy, even though sometimes we wish it wasn\'t there. Jealousy is extremely present in loving and sexual relationships, where it can even be glamorized as something good. Although even if it is universal, jealousy is completely useless in loving relationships. We can find that there is a difference in that aspect regarding genders (Harris, 2003; Weghosrt, 19882)</span><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">. More specifically, men tend to be more threaten by sexual conquest of their partners, while women are more scared of losing their partner\'s to another lover. This tends to be changing in recent years with gender roles evolution. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">Myths On Jealousy</span></h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Proof of someone\'s love </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We often hear people justifying their jealousy by advocating it is a demonstration of one\'s love towards their partner\'s. First, we must make a point very clear:<u> jealousy is not a proof of love</u>. On the contrary, it is a lack of love for one\'s self. A person who feels jealous demonstrates a lack of self-confidence and imagines that they will or can be replaced when the opportunity might present itself. This implies that we consider others to be a menace to the stability of our couple. We show our worries, our fears and apprehensions when we express our jealousy in front of our partner. Inversely, a person with a high self-esteem (no-jealousy) has a feeling of security in their relationship and they demonstrate their love (seen by the satisfaction in the couple) rather than by jealousy (feeling of being insecure). </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>Being Jealous Protects me From Being Cheated On</u></span></h4>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"><u> </u></span></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">Some will explain that their jealousy protects them from been cheated on by their partners. Once again, this could not be further from the truth. Jealousy brings interrogations, unjustified suspicions, constant surveillance and a lack of trust between partners. A perfect recipe for an unsatisfying relationship and constant bickering and fighting! These behaviors tend to push away our partner towards another person because they become dissatisfied with the relationship with the jealous person. We can then attest that jealousy creates the worst fear and what they are trying to ultimately avoid: losing their partner to someone else. It is not unlikely that partners constantly barraged by the other\'s jealous behavior wants to leave the relationship and sometimes by cheating. Therefore, jealousy can sometimes cause someone to cheat. Of course, the decision remains in the hands of the one who committed the act, but nevertheless, jealous partners should consider how they might have pushed the other into their own worst fears.</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Complete absence of jealousy demonstrates a detachment and indifference </span></u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">« I love that my partner is jealous, it demonstrates how they are concerned about me». This typical citation is as false as saying jealousy is a proof of love. Couples who seek to make their partner\'s feel jealous are searching to be falsely reassured about their relationship. They seek attention when they feel there is a distance being created between them. We, therefore, believe that our partner showing their jealousy is demonstrating attachment towards the relationship and that they aren\'t indifferent to us. When we think about it, there are healthier ways of demonstrating our attachment towards each other. Considering that jealousy is a feeling that makes us suffer, why would we ever want our partner to feel it in any way, shape or form and more precisely in the name of love? Sounds contradictory doesn\'t it...well it is! In a stable and healthy relationship, we feel love and attachment towards each other in a good way, not by feeling insecure and scared of losing the other person, with destructive behaviors of jealousy. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: center;\" align=\"center\">\r\n<h4><span lang=\"FR\"><u>I trust my partner, I just don\'t trust other people</u></span></h4>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">A lot of jealous people will affirm that they trust their partner, but not the people surrounding him such as friends, colleagues and the like. We imagine that if someone flirts or tries anything with our partner, they have no other choice but to cheat. It is a strange way to think indeed. We must come quickly to the conclusion that we always have a choice in our lives to do or not to do something. If someone flirts, tries to kiss you or any other thing related to affection or sex, there is always the possibility of telling that person that we are in a committed relationship and ask them to stop. This responsibility is solely of the person who is engaged in a relationship. Our partner\'s are not territories we need to protect from outside intrusions. They can do that by themselves. </span>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge.jpeg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/jealous-couple-38384539557_xlarge-300x200.jpeg\" width=\"320\" height=\"213\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">We must also consider that the commitment that two partners have taken together about being loyal in the relationship is only between those two people. First of all, others might not be aware of this loyalty between you and perceives your partner as free game. Secondly, they don\'t have the obligation to follow the loyalty you have put forward as they never committed to it, your partner did. Thirdly, we have no control over what others do, and that includes your partner. We must therefore trust your partner that he will put the limits required by your engagement to be loyal and not commit adultery. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">If you don\'t trust your partner to put those limits, maybe you need to have a serious talk about it with them or reflect by yourself the importance of your commitment towards each other in that regard. A few questions to ask yourself about this issue. </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do you imagine your partner in a situation where they are being flirted with?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How do they react? Do they cheat?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">How would you react in the same situation (you being flirted by someone)?</span></li>\r\n 	<li><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\">Do you put your limits or would you cheat?</span></li>\r\n</ul>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Depending on your answers to theses questions, you might have realized that you would have cheated if placed in a situation where you could do it. Sometimes, the person that is jealous is actually projecting on their partner their own desire to cheat and they need others to put limits on them so they don\'t cross the line. But most of the time, they restrict their partners instead to soothe their own anxieties, rather than learning to establish their limits in similar situations. </span></div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<h3><span lang=\"FR\">What you need to remember</span></h3>\r\n<div><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">In conclusion, it is important to understand that feelings of jealousy will probably always be present in one way or another. Rarely will we see a person that is entirely confident in every aspect of their lives and never feel jealous. We all have experiences where we were hurt and made us feel bad about ourselves and it created jealousy.</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/08/break_up_relationship-300x200.jpg\" width=\"320\" height=\"212\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<span lang=\"FR\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></span>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\"> </span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"><span lang=\"FR\">Although, what is also very important to understand is that our feelings must not decrease our relationship satisfaction because we feel insecure about ourselves. We must all learn to self-sooth our feelings and let our partner be who they are, rather than limiting each other in different aspects of your lives together. It is fundamental that you work on these issues rather than justify your jealousy as being a good thing for the stability of your couple, as it does the complete opposite of that. </span>\r\n<span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span><span lang=\"FR\">\r\n</span></div>\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2016/11/francois-278x300.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like these? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Harris, Christine. 2003. A Review of Sex Differences in Sexual Jealousy, Including Self-Report Data, Psychophysiological Responses, Interpersonal Violence, and Morbid Jealousy <i>Personality and Social Psychology Review</i>. Vol. 7. No. 2, 102-128.</div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 6pt;\"><span style=\"font-size: 10pt;\">Weghorst, Suzanne. 1982. Male Sexual Jealousy. <span style=\"color: black;\">Ethology &amp; Sociobiology Volume 3, Issue 1, 11-27.</span></span></div>', 'Jealousy: Destroyer of couples', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '30-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-07 01:23:18', '2017-06-06 23:23:18', '', 30, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/30-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(231, 2, '2017-06-07 01:31:47', '2017-06-06 23:31:47', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">One giant leap backwards for female sexuality...</span></h2>\n<div></div>\n<h3>Women are perceived as the problem</h3>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\nThere exist numerous reasons as to why a person would have a lower sexual desire in a relationship. They are actually multiple in most cases and they necessitate a variety of interventions to find a solution to the situation. For a long time now, we have categorized women as the partner who loses sexual desire (libido) in a couple because men are the high desire partners due to their hormones, more specifically testosterone. We tend to notice that in sexologist offices we find as many men being the low desire partner in the couple. In fact, we even see many gay couples where either one or both partner has a lower sexual desire.\n\nFor some reason, we continue to perceive women as the gender who loses sexual desire or has less than men as a general rule in long term relationships. The reason why men and women lose their sexual desire does tend to differ though. What we are noticing more in female sexuality is a lack of interest for sexual activity, not because they have deregulated hormones or neurotransmitters or that women just have less sexual drive than men, but it is because they are sexually bored with their partner\'s. Women seek variety, spontaneity, newness, a sense of adventure and exploration and a context to their sex life, as well as a<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/09/webserie-02-sexual-presence-sexual-performance.html\"> sexual connection</a> (not necessarily an emotional one, but a sexual one)\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">When we are with the same partner for many years, it is only <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/12/webserie-03-maintaining-sexual-desire-in-long-term-relationships.html\">natural and normal to have a decrease in sexual desire</a>, if our sexuality is redundant, routine, predictable and with a lack of effort from both partners. A decrease in sexual desire is often not the problem, but more of a symptom of our <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy.html\">sexual and relationship dynamic</a> that needs to be worked at.</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lLHRHDZh2xc/VdstIhaSviI/AAAAAAAAAtw/jgl3Ko3hS1A/s1600/couple-souffrant-de-problemes-sexuels-illustration_18931_w300.jpg\"><img title=\"Lack sexual desire\" src=\"http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lLHRHDZh2xc/VdstIhaSviI/AAAAAAAAAtw/jgl3Ko3hS1A/s320/couple-souffrant-de-problemes-sexuels-illustration_18931_w300.jpg\" alt=\"decrease lack sexual female viagra\" width=\"284\" height=\"320\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\n</tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"font-size: 13px;\">Sexual difficulties</td>\n</tr>\n</tbody>\n</table>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What about female Viagra?</h3>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\nFor what reason this new medication won\'t help the majority of <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/03/womens-fierce-sexuality.html\">women who have a decrease in sexual desire?</a> The simple answer is: it doesn\'t take care of the cause, buy only the symptoms. By taking this pill, that has important side effects, will only give false hope to couples that should be analysing their relationship dynamic and their sexual satisfaction. The medication might have an impact for a certain time where the motivation to have sex will increase, but the couple\'s sex life will remain the same. Therefore, the problem will most likely resurface in a short amount of time. No medication can help boring sex for a prolonged period of time in long term relationships.\n\nToo often, one of the partners, most of the time women, perceive sex with their partner as an obligation of the relationship to maintain the couple or to avoid conflicts. After giving and receiving multiple times <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/03/different-levels-of-sexual-desire-between-partners-in-a-couple.html\">pity sex</a>, it is inevitable that the sex life of the couple will deteriorate and the relationship will also take a hard hit.\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">Video about female Viagra (French)</h4>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\">\nhttps://youtu.be/sk8tg5i0GCw\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<h3>Does this medication apply to certain women at least?</h3>\n<div>The short answer is yes...but with the following criteria:</div>\n<div>\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"color: black; font-family: \'Times New Roman\'; font-size: medium; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px;\">\n<ul style=\"font-style: normal;\">\n 	<li>Stable relationship for at least a year with a man (exclusions of lesbian couples)</li>\n 	<li>Loss of sexual desire must have been obtained during the relationship</li>\n 	<li>Complete loss of sexual desire (no erotic dreams or fantasies, no desire to masturbate)</li>\n 	<li>Sexual response must be functional capacity to lubricate and reach orgasm following stimulation</li>\n 	<li>+ 18 years old but not year having menopause</li>\n 	<li>Not be pregnant or breast feeding</li>\n 	<li>No psychotherapy in the last 3 months</li>\n 	<li>No medication related to mood disorders</li>\n 	<li>No suicidal thought ever in life</li>\n 	<li>No relationship difficulties</li>\n 	<li>Good reaction from partner about the decrease in sexual desire</li>\n</ul>\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These criteria are not about the medication that will be released in October, but of the research that studied the medication Although, we can clearly see that this medication was aimed a very few women with a particular profile with this difficulty.</div>\n</div>\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\"></div>\n<div>\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Therefore, this pill might <i>«potentially» </i>help certain women and couples in dealing with this<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/01/a-lack-of-sexual-desire-is-good-for-your-couple.html\"> sexual difficulty that we find in the majority of relationships</a>, if and only if, the cause for the decrease in sexual desire is related to a deregulation of neurotransmitters in the female partner.</div>\n</div>\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n</div>\n<h3 style=\"font-style: normal;\">Finally!</h3>\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">If you or your partner is having a decrease or lack of sexual desire, take the time to really analyse your situation and determine if you need help from a sexologist &amp; psychotherapist or the medication or a combination of both.</div>\n</div>\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"></div>\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"><b>Francois Renaud M.A.</b></div>\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"><b>Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist Montreal</b></div>\n</div>\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\"></div>\n</div>', 'Female Viagra: Addyi', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '31-autosave-v1', '', '', '2017-06-07 01:31:47', '2017-06-06 23:31:47', '', 31, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/31-autosave-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0);
INSERT INTO `sle_3_posts` (`ID`, `post_author`, `post_date`, `post_date_gmt`, `post_content`, `post_title`, `post_excerpt`, `post_status`, `comment_status`, `ping_status`, `post_password`, `post_name`, `to_ping`, `pinged`, `post_modified`, `post_modified_gmt`, `post_content_filtered`, `post_parent`, `guid`, `menu_order`, `post_type`, `post_mime_type`, `comment_count`) VALUES
(232, 2, '2017-06-07 01:28:30', '2017-06-06 23:28:30', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">One giant leap backwards for female sexuality...</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>Women are perceived as the problem</h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">There exist numerous reasons as to why a person would have a lower sexual desire in a relationship. They are actually multiple in most cases and they necessitate a variety of interventions to find a solution to the situation. For a long time now, we have categorized women as the partner who loses sexual desire (libido) in a couple because men are the high desire partners due to their hormones, more specifically testosterone. We tend to notice that in sexologist offices we find as many men being the low desire partner in the couple. In fact, we even see many gay couples where either one or both partner has a lower sexual desire.\r\n\r\nFor some reason, we continue to perceive women as the gender who loses sexual desire or has less than men as a general rule in long term relationships. The reason why men and women lose their sexual desire does tend to differ though. What we are noticing more in female sexuality is a lack of interest for sexual activity, not because they have deregulated hormones or neurotransmitters or that women just have less sexual drive than men, but it is because they are sexually bored with their partner\'s. Women seek variety, spontaneity, newness, a sense of adventure and exploration and a context to their sex life, as well as a<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/09/webserie-02-sexual-presence-sexual-performance.html\"> sexual connection</a> (not necessarily an emotional one, but a sexual one)</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\nWhen we are with the same partner for many years, it is only <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/12/webserie-03-maintaining-sexual-desire-in-long-term-relationships.html\">natural and normal to have a decrease in sexual desire</a>, if our sexuality is redundant, routine, predictable and with a lack of effort from both partners. A decrease in sexual desire is often not the problem, but more of a symptom of our <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy.html\">sexual and relationship dynamic</a> that needs to be worked at.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lLHRHDZh2xc/VdstIhaSviI/AAAAAAAAAtw/jgl3Ko3hS1A/s1600/couple-souffrant-de-problemes-sexuels-illustration_18931_w300.jpg\"><img title=\"Lack sexual desire\" src=\"http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lLHRHDZh2xc/VdstIhaSviI/AAAAAAAAAtw/jgl3Ko3hS1A/s320/couple-souffrant-de-problemes-sexuels-illustration_18931_w300.jpg\" alt=\"decrease lack sexual female viagra\" width=\"284\" height=\"320\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"font-size: 13px;\">Sexual difficulties</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What about female Viagra?</h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">For what reason this new medication won\'t help the majority of <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/03/womens-fierce-sexuality.html\">women who have a decrease in sexual desire?</a> The simple answer is: it doesn\'t take care of the cause, buy only the symptoms. By taking this pill, that has important side effects, will only give false hope to couples that should be analysing their relationship dynamic and their sexual satisfaction. The medication might have an impact for a certain time where the motivation to have sex will increase, but the couple\'s sex life will remain the same. Therefore, the problem will most likely resurface in a short amount of time. No medication can help boring sex for a prolonged period of time in long term relationships.\r\n\r\nToo often, one of the partners, most of the time women, perceive sex with their partner as an obligation of the relationship to maintain the couple or to avoid conflicts. After giving and receiving multiple times <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/03/different-levels-of-sexual-desire-between-partners-in-a-couple.html\">pity sex</a>, it is inevitable that the sex life of the couple will deteriorate and the relationship will also take a hard hit.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">Video about female Viagra (French)</h4>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3>Does this medication apply to certain women at least?</h3>\r\n<div>The short answer is yes...but with the following criteria:</div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"color: black; font-family: \'Times New Roman\'; font-size: medium; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px;\">\r\n<ul style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n 	<li>Stable relationship for at least a year with a man (exclusions of lesbian couples)</li>\r\n 	<li>Loss of sexual desire must have been obtained during the relationship</li>\r\n 	<li>Complete loss of sexual desire (no erotic dreams or fantasies, no desire to masturbate)</li>\r\n 	<li>Sexual response must be functional capacity to lubricate and reach orgasm following stimulation</li>\r\n 	<li>+ 18 years old but not year having menopause</li>\r\n 	<li>Not be pregnant or breast feeding</li>\r\n 	<li>No psychotherapy in the last 3 months</li>\r\n 	<li>No medication related to mood disorders</li>\r\n 	<li>No suicidal thought ever in life</li>\r\n 	<li>No relationship difficulties</li>\r\n 	<li>Good reaction from partner about the decrease in sexual desire</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These criteria are not about the medication that will be released in October, but of the research that studied the medication Although, we can clearly see that this medication was aimed a very few women with a particular profile with this difficulty.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Therefore, this pill might <i>«potentially» </i>help certain women and couples in dealing with this<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/01/a-lack-of-sexual-desire-is-good-for-your-couple.html\"> sexual difficulty that we find in the majority of relationships</a>, if and only if, the cause for the decrease in sexual desire is related to a deregulation of neurotransmitters in the female partner.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<h3 style=\"font-style: normal;\">Finally!</h3>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">If you or your partner is having a decrease or lack of sexual desire, take the time to really analyse your situation and determine if you need help from a sexologist &amp; psychotherapist or the medication or a combination of both.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"><b>Francois Renaud M.A.</b></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"><b>Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist Montreal</b></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\"></div>\r\n</div>', 'Female Viagra: Addyi', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '31-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-07 01:28:30', '2017-06-06 23:28:30', '', 31, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/31-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(233, 2, '2017-06-07 01:32:12', '2017-06-06 23:32:12', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">One giant leap backwards for female sexuality...</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>Women are perceived as the problem</h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nThere exist numerous reasons as to why a person would have a lower sexual desire in a relationship. They are actually multiple in most cases and they necessitate a variety of interventions to find a solution to the situation. For a long time now, we have categorized women as the partner who loses sexual desire (libido) in a couple because men are the high desire partners due to their hormones, more specifically testosterone. We tend to notice that in sexologist offices we find as many men being the low desire partner in the couple. In fact, we even see many gay couples where either one or both partner has a lower sexual desire.\r\n\r\nFor some reason, we continue to perceive women as the gender who loses sexual desire or has less than men as a general rule in long term relationships. The reason why men and women lose their sexual desire does tend to differ though. What we are noticing more in female sexuality is a lack of interest for sexual activity, not because they have deregulated hormones or neurotransmitters or that women just have less sexual drive than men, but it is because they are sexually bored with their partner\'s. Women seek variety, spontaneity, newness, a sense of adventure and exploration and a context to their sex life, as well as a<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/09/webserie-02-sexual-presence-sexual-performance.html\"> sexual connection</a> (not necessarily an emotional one, but a sexual one)\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">When we are with the same partner for many years, it is only <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/12/webserie-03-maintaining-sexual-desire-in-long-term-relationships.html\">natural and normal to have a decrease in sexual desire</a>, if our sexuality is redundant, routine, predictable and with a lack of effort from both partners. A decrease in sexual desire is often not the problem, but more of a symptom of our <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy.html\">sexual and relationship dynamic</a> that needs to be worked at.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<table style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" align=\"center\">\r\n<tbody>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td><a style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" href=\"http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lLHRHDZh2xc/VdstIhaSviI/AAAAAAAAAtw/jgl3Ko3hS1A/s1600/couple-souffrant-de-problemes-sexuels-illustration_18931_w300.jpg\"><img title=\"Lack sexual desire\" src=\"http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lLHRHDZh2xc/VdstIhaSviI/AAAAAAAAAtw/jgl3Ko3hS1A/s320/couple-souffrant-de-problemes-sexuels-illustration_18931_w300.jpg\" alt=\"decrease lack sexual female viagra\" width=\"284\" height=\"320\" border=\"0\" /></a></td>\r\n</tr>\r\n<tr>\r\n<td style=\"font-size: 13px;\">Sexual difficulties</td>\r\n</tr>\r\n</tbody>\r\n</table>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">What about female Viagra?</h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nFor what reason this new medication won\'t help the majority of <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/03/womens-fierce-sexuality.html\">women who have a decrease in sexual desire?</a> The simple answer is: it doesn\'t take care of the cause, buy only the symptoms. By taking this pill, that has important side effects, will only give false hope to couples that should be analysing their relationship dynamic and their sexual satisfaction. The medication might have an impact for a certain time where the motivation to have sex will increase, but the couple\'s sex life will remain the same. Therefore, the problem will most likely resurface in a short amount of time. No medication can help boring sex for a prolonged period of time in long term relationships.\r\n\r\nToo often, one of the partners, most of the time women, perceive sex with their partner as an obligation of the relationship to maintain the couple or to avoid conflicts. After giving and receiving multiple times <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/03/different-levels-of-sexual-desire-between-partners-in-a-couple.html\">pity sex</a>, it is inevitable that the sex life of the couple will deteriorate and the relationship will also take a hard hit.\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">Video about female Viagra (French)</h4>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\"><iframe src=\"https://www.youtube.com/embed/sk8tg5i0GCw\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"></iframe>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3>Does this medication apply to certain women at least?</h3>\r\n<div>The short answer is yes...but with the following criteria:</div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"color: black; font-family: \'Times New Roman\'; font-size: medium; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px;\">\r\n<ul style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n 	<li>Stable relationship for at least a year with a man (exclusions of lesbian couples)</li>\r\n 	<li>Loss of sexual desire must have been obtained during the relationship</li>\r\n 	<li>Complete loss of sexual desire (no erotic dreams or fantasies, no desire to masturbate)</li>\r\n 	<li>Sexual response must be functional capacity to lubricate and reach orgasm following stimulation</li>\r\n 	<li>+ 18 years old but not year having menopause</li>\r\n 	<li>Not be pregnant or breast feeding</li>\r\n 	<li>No psychotherapy in the last 3 months</li>\r\n 	<li>No medication related to mood disorders</li>\r\n 	<li>No suicidal thought ever in life</li>\r\n 	<li>No relationship difficulties</li>\r\n 	<li>Good reaction from partner about the decrease in sexual desire</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These criteria are not about the medication that will be released in October, but of the research that studied the medication Although, we can clearly see that this medication was aimed a very few women with a particular profile with this difficulty.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\"></div>\r\n<div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Therefore, this pill might <i>«potentially» </i>help certain women and couples in dealing with this<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/01/a-lack-of-sexual-desire-is-good-for-your-couple.html\"> sexual difficulty that we find in the majority of relationships</a>, if and only if, the cause for the decrease in sexual desire is related to a deregulation of neurotransmitters in the female partner.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<h3 style=\"font-style: normal;\">Finally!</h3>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">If you or your partner is having a decrease or lack of sexual desire, take the time to really analyse your situation and determine if you need help from a sexologist &amp; psychotherapist or the medication or a combination of both.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"><b>Francois Renaud M.A.</b></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"><b>Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist Montreal</b></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\"></div>\r\n</div>', 'Female Viagra: Addyi', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '31-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-07 01:32:12', '2017-06-06 23:32:12', '', 31, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/31-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(394, 2, '2017-09-30 00:13:39', '2017-09-29 22:13:39', '<h2><span style=\"font-size: x-large;\">One giant leap backwards for female sexuality...</span></h2>\r\n<div></div>\r\n<h3>Women are perceived as the problem</h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nThere exist numerous reasons as to why a person would have a lower sexual desire in a relationship. They are actually multiple in most cases and they necessitate a variety of interventions to find a solution to the situation. For a long time now, we have categorized women as the partner who loses sexual desire (libido) in a couple because men are the high desire partners due to their hormones, more specifically testosterone. We tend to notice that in sexologist offices we find as many men being the low desire partner in the couple. In fact, we even see many gay couples where either one or both partner has a lower sexual desire.\r\n\r\nFor some reason, we continue to perceive women as the gender who loses sexual desire or has less than men as a general rule in long term relationships. The reason why men and women lose their sexual desire does tend to differ though. What we are noticing more in female sexuality is a lack of interest for sexual activity, not because they have deregulated hormones or neurotransmitters or that women just have less sexual drive than men, but it is because they are sexually bored with their partner\'s. Women seek variety, spontaneity, newness, a sense of adventure and exploration and a context to their sex life, as well as a<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/09/webserie-02-sexual-presence-sexual-performance.html\"> sexual connection</a> (not necessarily an emotional one, but a sexual one)\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">When we are with the same partner for many years, it is only <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/12/webserie-03-maintaining-sexual-desire-in-long-term-relationships.html\">natural and normal to have a decrease in sexual desire</a>, if our sexuality is redundant, routine, predictable and with a lack of effort from both partners. A decrease in sexual desire is often not the problem, but more of a symptom of our <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy.html\">sexual and relationship dynamic</a> that needs to be worked at.</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h3 style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\nFor what reason this new medication won\'t help the majority of <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/03/womens-fierce-sexuality.html\">women who have a decrease in sexual desire?</a> The simple answer is: it doesn\'t take care of the cause, buy only the symptoms. By taking this pill, that has important side effects, will only give false hope to couples that should be analysing their relationship dynamic and their sexual satisfaction. The medication might have an impact for a certain time where the motivation to have sex will increase, but the couple\'s sex life will remain the same. Therefore, the problem will most likely resurface in a short amount of time. No medication can help boring sex for a prolonged period of time in long term relationships.What about female Viagra?</h3>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\nToo often, one of the partners, most of the time women, perceive sex with their partner as an obligation of the relationship to maintain the couple or to avoid conflicts. After giving and receiving multiple times <a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/03/different-levels-of-sexual-desire-between-partners-in-a-couple.html\">pity sex</a>, it is inevitable that the sex life of the couple will deteriorate and the relationship will also take a hard hit.\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">Video about female Viagra (French)</h4>\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\">\r\n\r\n<iframe src=\"https://www.youtube.com/embed/sk8tg5i0GCw\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"></iframe>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<h3>Does this medication apply to certain women at least?</h3>\r\n<div>The short answer is yes...but with the following criteria:</div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"color: black; font-family: \'Times New Roman\'; font-size: medium; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px;\">\r\n<ul style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n 	<li>Stable relationship for at least a year with a man (exclusions of lesbian couples)</li>\r\n 	<li>Loss of sexual desire must have been obtained during the relationship</li>\r\n 	<li>Complete loss of sexual desire (no erotic dreams or fantasies, no desire to masturbate)</li>\r\n 	<li>Sexual response must be functional capacity to lubricate and reach orgasm following stimulation</li>\r\n 	<li>+ 18 years old but not year having menopause</li>\r\n 	<li>Not be pregnant or breast feeding</li>\r\n 	<li>No psychotherapy in the last 3 months</li>\r\n 	<li>No medication related to mood disorders</li>\r\n 	<li>No suicidal thought ever in life</li>\r\n 	<li>No relationship difficulties</li>\r\n 	<li>Good reaction from partner about the decrease in sexual desire</li>\r\n</ul>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">These criteria are not about the medication that will be released in October, but of the research that studied the medication Although, we can clearly see that this medication was aimed a very few women with a particular profile with this difficulty.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\"></div>\r\n<div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Therefore, this pill might <i>«potentially» </i>help certain women and couples in dealing with this<a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/01/a-lack-of-sexual-desire-is-good-for-your-couple.html\"> sexual difficulty that we find in the majority of relationships</a>, if and only if, the cause for the decrease in sexual desire is related to a deregulation of neurotransmitters in the female partner.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<h3 style=\"font-style: normal;\">Finally!</h3>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\">\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">If you or your partner is having a decrease or lack of sexual desire, take the time to really analyse your situation and determine if you need help from a sexologist &amp; psychotherapist or the medication or a combination of both.</div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"><b>Francois Renaud M.A.</b></div>\r\n<div style=\"margin: 0px;\"><b>Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist Montreal</b></div>\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"font-style: normal;\"></div>\r\n</div>', 'Female Viagra: Addyi', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '31-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-09-30 00:13:39', '2017-09-29 22:13:39', '', 31, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/09/31-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(234, 2, '2017-06-07 01:41:23', '2017-06-06 23:41:23', '<h2 style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>How to Achieve Self-Validated Sexual Desire*</b></span></h2>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"CENTER\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b> </b></span></div>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> There is a fundamental difference between self-validated intimacy and all the <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/03/different-types-of-sexual-desire.html\">other types of desire</a></span> we mentioned in previous articles. It is on the level of <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy.html\">intimacy </a></span>that we can perceive it; more specifically the perception of ourselves and our authenticity. Feelings of being desirable are based for many people on the perception that their partner has of them. This way of functioning inevitably kills sexual desire in couples who have stayed at the <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/03/different-types-of-sexual-desire-part-ii.html\">attachment phase of sexual desire</a></span>. At the beginning of a relationship, we seek to obtain others validation and approval, especially in sex. We want to be desirable in the eyes of our partner, we want to be able to offer sexual pleasure, to seduce and be loved at all cost. All of this is necessary and enjoyable in couples, although in long term relationships this dynamic weighs negatively on sexual desire. </span></div>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"></div>\n<h3 style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>Self-Validation</b></span></h3>\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b> </b></span></div>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\">There are four fundamental elements that play a role in sexual desire in long-term relationships. </span></div>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"></div>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<ul>\n 	<li lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><b>Our self-perception or self-esteem</b></li>\n 	<li lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>Our partner\'s perception of us </b></span></li>\n 	<li lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>The perception we have of our partner</b></span></li>\n 	<li lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>The way we treat and are treated by our partner</b></span></li>\n</ul>\n&nbsp;\n\n<hr />\n\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> These four aspects have an important impact on our own sense of being desirable and the desire we have for our lover. A person can have a high sexual desire, but it isn\'t necessarily aimed towards their partner\'s. For which they may have lost respect for during the long years of living and being together. Following a <span style=\"background-color: white;\">plethora </span>of numerous conflicts, deceptions, rejections, lost of integrity and low blows (<span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/04/unhealthy-couple-dynamics.html\">Normal Marital Sadism</a></span>) in their sex lives, they can diminish their admiration for their partner\'s and their own self-worth. This brings partners to seek for validation from others to feel desirable and desire. This dynamic can be translated in these terms: \'\'I want you to find me desirable because I can\'t find myself to be desirable\'\'.</span></div>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"></div>\n<div></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> We often repeat that a good self-esteem, having confidence and being assertive is sexually desirable. The thing is, in long term relationships we get to see our partner in their most vulnerable states and glimpse at their insecurities. We know when they are seeking approval from us or others. This lowers sexual desire towards one or both partners. This is where <span style=\"color: #6fa8dc;\">alliances </span>between partners in a relationship becomes either <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/03/unhealthy-relationship-patterns.html\">collusive,combative or non-existent</a></span>. This difficult transition for couples to past from a other validated intimacy to self-validated intimacy necessitates a commitment to ourselves and a <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/04/construct-a-healthier-couples-dynamic.html\">collaborative alliance</a></span> in the couple. Certain couples are capable of overcoming these normal hardships with their own <span style=\"background-color: white;\">volition</span>and <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy-sexual-desire-part-4.html\">emotional balance</a></span>. On the other hand, many will need help from a sex-therapist who specializes in couples and sexual desire issues. This process with or without a professional obliges partners to self-confront about their anxieties, insecurities, short-comings and learn how to self-validate during periods of intense emotions and sexual intimacy. </span></div>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><b style=\"font-family: verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 150%;\">\n</b><b style=\"font-family: verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 150%;\">Want to learn more?</b></div>\n<h4 style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b><a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/webvideo_sexuality_sensuality_erotic/\">Watch Sensual &amp; Erotic Education webseries!</a></b></span></h4>\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> </span></div>\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> </span></div>\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> </span></div>\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b> </b></span></div>\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"></div>\n&nbsp;\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\nLearn more about the author\n\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n\n<hr />\n\n</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like theses? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\n\n<style type=\"text/css\">\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br /></style>\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\n</label>\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\n</div>\n</form></div>\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->', 'Different Types of Sexual Desire Part III', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '34-autosave-v1', '', '', '2017-06-07 01:41:23', '2017-06-06 23:41:23', '', 34, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/34-autosave-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(235, 2, '2017-06-07 01:38:41', '2017-06-06 23:38:41', '<h2 style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>How to Achieve Self-Validated Sexual Desire*</b></span></h2>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"CENTER\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> There is a fundamental difference between self-validated intimacy and all the <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/03/different-types-of-sexual-desire.html\">other types of desire</a></span> we mentioned in previous articles. It is on the level of <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2013/06/sexual-intimacy.html\">intimacy </a></span>that we can perceive it; more specifically the perception of ourselves and our authenticity. Feelings of being desirable are based for many people on the perception that their partner has of them. This way of functioning inevitably kills sexual desire in couples who have stayed at the <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2015/03/different-types-of-sexual-desire-part-ii.html\">attachment phase of sexual desire</a></span>. At the beginning of a relationship, we seek to obtain others validation and approval, especially in sex. We want to be desirable in the eyes of our partner, we want to be able to offer sexual pleasure, to seduce and be loved at all cost. All of this is necessary and enjoyable in couples, although in long term relationships this dynamic weighs negatively on sexual desire. </span></div>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"></div>\r\n<h3 style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>Self-Validation</b></span></h3>\r\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\">There are four fundamental elements that play a role in sexual desire in long-term relationships. </span></div>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"></div>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<ul>\r\n 	<li lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><b>Our self-perception or self-esteem</b></li>\r\n 	<li lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>Our partner\'s perception of us </b></span></li>\r\n 	<li lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>The perception we have of our partner</b></span></li>\r\n 	<li lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b>The way we treat and are treated by our partner</b></span></li>\r\n</ul>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> These four aspects have an important impact on our own sense of being desirable and the desire we have for our lover. A person can have a high sexual desire, but it isn\'t necessarily aimed towards their partner\'s. For which they may have lost respect for during the long years of living and being together. Following a <span style=\"background-color: white;\">plethora </span>of numerous conflicts, deceptions, rejections, lost of integrity and low blows (<span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2014/04/unhealthy-couple-dynamics.html\">Normal Marital Sadism</a></span>) in their sex lives, they can diminish their admiration for their partner\'s and their own self-worth. This brings partners to seek for validation from others to feel desirable and desire. This dynamic can be translated in these terms: \'\'I want you to find me desirable because I can\'t find myself to be desirable\'\'.</span></div>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"></div>\r\n<div></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> We often repeat that a good self-esteem, having confidence and being assertive is sexually desirable. The thing is, in long term relationships we get to see our partner in their most vulnerable states and glimpse at their insecurities. We know when they are seeking approval from us or others. This lowers sexual desire towards one or both partners. This is where <span style=\"color: #6fa8dc;\">alliances </span>between partners in a relationship becomes either <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2014/03/unhealthy-relationship-patterns.html\">collusive,combative or non-existent</a></span>. This difficult transition for couples to past from a other validated intimacy to self-validated intimacy necessitates a commitment to ourselves and a <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2014/04/construct-a-healthier-couples-dynamic.html\">collaborative alliance</a></span> in the couple. Certain couples are capable of overcoming these normal hardships with their own <span style=\"background-color: white;\">volition</span>and <span style=\"color: #00dcff;\"><a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.agence360.co/2013/06/sexual-intimacy-sexual-desire-part-4.html\">emotional balance</a></span>. On the other hand, many will need help from a sex-therapist who specializes in couples and sexual desire issues. This process with or without a professional obliges partners to self-confront about their anxieties, insecurities, short-comings and learn how to self-validate during periods of intense emotions and sexual intimacy. </span></div>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"><b style=\"font-family: verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 150%;\">\r\n</b><b style=\"font-family: verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 150%;\">Want to learn more?</b></div>\r\n<h4 style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b><a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/video_sexuality\">Watch Sensual &amp; Erotic Education webseries!</a></b></span></h4>\r\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"> </span></div>\r\n<div><span style=\"font-size: 16pt;\"><b> </b></span></div>\r\n<div lang=\"en-CA\" style=\"line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 0cm;\" align=\"JUSTIFY\"></div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div style=\"line-height: 24px; text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a style=\"clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" href=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s1600/francois.jpg\"><img src=\"https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hkwcEustEO4/V6VEeliMAwI/AAAAAAAAA7Y/AJwphVNSI9MePYpL7j2GMkYPfl---AruACLcB/s200/francois.jpg\" width=\"185\" height=\"200\" border=\"0\" /></a></div>\r\nLearn more about the author\r\n\r\n<a href=\"http://sexcoupletherapy.com/en/pages/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Francois Renaud M.A.</a>\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sex therapist &amp; psychotherapist in Downtown Montreal</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">\r\n\r\n<hr />\r\n\r\n</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\">Want more articles like theses? Subscribe to our monthly newsletter</div>\r\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"></div>\r\n<!-- Begin MailChimp Signup Form -->\r\n\r\n<style type=\"text/css\">\r\n	#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }<br />\r\n	/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.<br />\r\n	   We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */<br />\r\n</style>\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup\"><form id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" class=\"validate\" action=\"//sexcoupletherapy.us8.list-manage.com/subscribe/post?u=b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d&amp;id=fd88d57b31\" method=\"post\" name=\"mc-embedded-subscribe-form\" novalidate=\"\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n<div id=\"mc_embed_signup_scroll\">\r\n<h2>Subscribe to our mailing list</h2>\r\n<div class=\"indicates-required\"><span class=\"asterisk\">*</span> indicates required</div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-EMAIL\">Email Address <span class=\"asterisk\">*</span>\r\n</label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-EMAIL\" class=\"required email\" name=\"EMAIL\" type=\"email\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-FNAME\">First Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-FNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"FNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"mc-field-group\"><label for=\"mce-LNAME\">Last Name </label>\r\n<input id=\"mce-LNAME\" class=\"\" name=\"LNAME\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div id=\"mce-responses\" class=\"clear\"></div>\r\n<!-- real people should not fill this in and expect good things - do not remove this or risk form bot signups-->\r\n<div style=\"position: absolute; left: -5000px;\"><input tabindex=\"-1\" name=\"b_b99a753a12fded994c86ffc1d_fd88d57b31\" type=\"text\" value=\"\" /></div>\r\n<div class=\"clear\"><input id=\"mc-embedded-subscribe\" class=\"button\" name=\"subscribe\" type=\"submit\" value=\"Subscribe\" /></div>\r\n</div>\r\n</form></div>\r\n<script type=\'text/javascript\' src=\'//s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js\'></script><script type=\'text/javascript\'>(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=\'EMAIL\';ftypes[0]=\'email\';fnames[1]=\'FNAME\';ftypes[1]=\'text\';fnames[2]=\'LNAME\';ftypes[2]=\'text\';}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);</script>\r\n<!--End mc_embed_signup-->', 'Different Types of Sexual Desire Part III', '', 'inherit', 'closed', 'closed', '', '34-revision-v1', '', '', '2017-06-07 01:38:41', '2017-06-06 23:38:41', '', 34, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/2017/06/34-revision-v1.html', 0, 'revision', '', 0),
(236, 2, '2017-06-07 01:58:36', '2017-06-06 23:58:36', '', 'désir sexuel', '', 'inherit', 'open', 'closed', '', 'couple-hugging-drawing-4', '', '', '2017-06-07 01:58:46', '2017-06-06 23:58:46', '', 34, 'http://montreal.sexcoupletherapy.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/03/Couple-Hugging-Drawing-4.jpg', 0, 'attachment', 'image/jpeg', 0);
